What do you call two homosexuals in fancy hats? It depends, you have to ask their names first.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? Lots of stuff.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

wait am i supposed to right the joke down here

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the mushroom go to the party? He was feeling upset because his wife left him and took full custody of his three kids. His friend cheered him up and took him to the party. At the party, he did a line of cocaine and became a drug addict. He died six months later.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

how do you kill a blonde? -a gun, knife or any other lethal object

thumb_up thumb_down +50

man: honey im home woman: john im pregnant man: but i have a low sperm count! this is a miracle! woman: its not your baby its steves from the store man:but he's mexican! woman: i know.....i need an abortion. {lol racism}

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Myspace

thumb_up thumb_down +44

what do you call the one eyed man in the land of the blind? You call him an outcast

thumb_up thumb_down +40

How did sally fall off the swings? she had no arms. Knock knock, who is there? Not sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

A Blonde walks into a bar. She is an abusive relationship and is drinking her pain away.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Women Drivers.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road? it said WALK.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What did the pedephile do to the young boy? Smiled at him, said hello, and kept on walking.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night to see your TV floating in midair? "I should probably lay off the hallucinogens."

thumb_up thumb_down +36

You: I have a really funny Knock Knock joke but you have to start it. Someone Else: Okay, Knock Knock You: Who's there? (now watch their face as they become confused)

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What do you call a retarded man? Nothing, because it's inappropriate to call retarded people names.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

why does everyone hate chris. cause he's a douchebag.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What happens every 10 seconds in Africa? 10 seconds passes by.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What is the best thing since sliced bread? Sliced butter.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What do you call a black guy with Alzheimer's? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Roses are red Violets are blue I rhyme like lil Wayne Fridge

thumb_up thumb_down +30

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What's red and round? A red and round solid.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops