Roses are red Violets are blue I have genital warts Now you do too

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what did the black man do for his family? nothing

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A man walks into a bar... ...because he is blind.

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Nickelback.

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(insert Anti-Joke here)

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why did the little old lady die? she was mugged then shot in the head 5 times.

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why did the kid go in his room and lock the door. to masturbate

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A man walks into a bar, he then falls unconscious and driven safely to the hospital.

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What did the lighthouse say to the tree? Nothing because they are both unatimate objects and cannot speak

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT SALLY.

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What's worse than a dead baby? A dead puppy.

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a mexican, an asian and a black are all in a car, who's the driver? their friend bill who offered to take them to the upcoming three days grace concert.

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Knock Knock. Come in. -mattobrado

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What do you call a pickle that is sad? A pickle!????

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What do a bunch of dead babies look like in a blender? I don't know I was too busy masturbating.

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Q: How do you kill a blonde? A: Put M&M's on the bottom of a pool, and tell her to arrange them in alphabetical order. By the time she starts to question this, the poison should be kicking in.

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What's the difference between your wife and a female dog? none - they are both bitches!

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Whats why was the 18 year old boy scared of his dad? Cause his dad butt raped him when he was 7.

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Why does Jerry sandusky like little boys? Because each and every intellectual human being have different interests

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If you look up stupid in the dictionary the definition would say stu·pid? ?[stoo-pid, styoo?] -er, -est, noun adjective 1. lacking ordinary quickness and keenness of mind; dull. 2. characterized by or proceeding from mental dullness; foolish; senseless: a stupid question. 3. tediously dull, especially due to lack of meaning or sense; inane; pointless: a stupid party. 4. annoying or irritating; troublesome: Turn off that stupid radio. 5. in a state of stupor; stupefied: stupid from fatigue.

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What break when you talk?

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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Your mom is so fat she beat up snorlax from pokémon, than got charged for abbuse because it is illegal to use physical violence on pokémon unless in a battle or in attempt to capture one.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? The IRS.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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