Why did the woman hate waiting in line? Two reasons really: almost an entire day had passed since her last intake of non-prescription drugs plus she was generally apprehensive that the witness would identify her.

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i went to have a wank over anime as well yesterday, the i realised i dont have a penis. -adam fantuzzi

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When I'm through with you... They will never find your body... And even if they did... All they find would be teeth!!!

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I think I may be colorblind.

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Your mom is so fat that she sat on a rock.

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Why were corners made? For crying.

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How Do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door put the elephant in and close the door. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door take the elephant out put the giraffe in and close the door. The lion king has a meeting with all the animals but one doesn't turn up, which one is it? The giraffe because it's still in the fridge.

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What's worse than throwing 8 babies off a cliff? Throwing 1 baby off a cliff.

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What does a Jew do when he sees a masked man at his door? He grabs a phone to alert the police and hides in his bedroom.

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What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eye patch? Names

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Grapefruit.

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What do u say to a blond when she says what a name. i love u baby i hate u baby.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the immigrants.

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Why did a guy with a lisp, v-neck, and piercings pee while sitting down? His joints hurt.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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How do you make a girl happy then sad within 5 seconds? Buy her a pony and then shoot it

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¿Por qué seis de los siete miedo? ¡Porque siete ocho nueve!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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Womens rights.

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What break when you talk?

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yesterday i saw a man walking down the street with no legs. just kidding.

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Why can't Billy ride the bicycle? Billy's a fish.

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Jonathan is like a btterfly. They're both asianu

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose fell on your head." ..."MMMBBWWAAAAAGGGHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops