Why did the insect play marco polo? It couldn't. Marco polo requires multiple players.

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A man walks into a bar and says ouch, as he stubbed his foot when he became fully enclosed in the tavern.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it is common to find chickens and other wild and/or domesticated animals roaming through the streets in a multitude of countries.

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whats small, black, and crispy? a baby in a drier

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How do you check that you are not dreaming, but in actual fact, you are wide awake? Try to bite off our finger (this is actually possible, but the brain does not allow you to do it).

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What did the cowboy say to the alien? Nothing, this is a dream. Wake up.

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Lightening never strikes the same place twice. But it killed both my parents.

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What do you call a Mexican who steals a car? A criminal.

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OK, A plane carrying 200 passengers crashes on the border between America and Canada. Which side of the border do you bury the victims? Well, it would depend on where the passengers where from or what they had stipulated in their living will. I suppose some would be cremated which opens up a whole other can of worms entirely.

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Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

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what did rebecca say to sabrina ? CALL wass !!

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Q. How do you make an atheist appreciate life? A. Break his legs.

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What happens if you throw a red ruby into the black sea? It gets wet.

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What do you call a deaf person? You don't they can't hear you.

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Whats sad about a black women killing herself? She was my mother

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Why are "Polish" and "polish" spelled the same? The word is a homophone.

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Your mom is so fat, her pants are starting to get tight.

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What do you call a banana that's about to be eaten? A Banana

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There's a American, Mexican, and a Canadian stranded in the desert. They couldn't find any food, water, and shelter. They were all really hungry and thirsty. Later that day the Mexican dies from a very bad infection on his neck.

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Why did the passenger plane crash? Well, if not mechanical failure or human error, probably because a bomb was detonated onboard.

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream on the floor? Getting the end of your penis stapled

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Women rights.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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It's a scientific fact that if you took all the veins out of your body, and lined them up end to end, you would die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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