One time i ate a sandwich it was good

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What has human male genitalia? A human male

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Man: Drink this. Man 2: Ok. (Drinks it) Man; You drank a powerful substance that is 20000 times stronger than hydrochloric acid! Man2: Oh FUCK! Kelvin Yang.

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Your life That's the joke

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What do you call a boy with no arms and a hunchback? -names

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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Why aren't jokes funny in base 8? Because 7, 10, 11.

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Two gay men in a hottub. They relaxed for about half an hour before getting out and going to the bed, where they fell asleep.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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What do you call an insect that has 8 legs? A spider.

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What do divorce and a loose bear in a zoo have in common? They both tear families apart

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knock knock. who's there? whoer whoer who? whoer you?

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Hey Jim? What? Pass the stapler.

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What do you call a dragon that doesn't breathe fire? A Griffin.

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Yo mama so fat she died

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Q:A man has 100 chocolate bars he eats 93 of them. What has he got now? A:Diabetes

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What do you get when you cross a porcupine with party balloons? Unhappy kids

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What's worst than Rick Perry? Two Rick Perrys.

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25

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What's worse than getting stuck in traffic? AIDS.

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If John has 50 candy bars, and he eats 45, how many cadybars does John have? Diabetes, John has diabetes.

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A man is walking down the street when, on the other side, he see's another man, with what appears to be an orange for a head. Unable to contain his curiosity, he approaches and enquires: "Excuse me, but I couldn't help noticing that you have you have an orange for a head..." "That's right" says the man with an orange for a head. "I met a magical genie one day who granted me three wishes..." "Amazing" says the first man, "Please continue". "Well, for my first wish, I wished I was incredibly rich, and that every day, I woke up in a four-poster bed full of used bank notes, and a statement with twenty zeros". "Did that happen?" askes the first man. "It did indeed", replies the man with an orange for a head. "I'm probably the richest man in the world". "Amazing!" replies the first man. "What did you wish for next?" "For my second wish, I wished to be incredibly attractive to women, and that every day, in my four poster bed full of money, when I awoke, there would be three of the most beautiful, naked women imaginable." "Wow! Did THAT happen?" "Of course! To be honest though, that gets a bit of a bind - walking around is a bit difficult these days, in fact, I'm on my way to pick up some cream." "No way, that's amazing!" says the first man. "What was your third wish?" "Well..." replies the man with an orange for a head, "For my third wish, I wished I had an orange for a head."

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Knock Knock Who's There? ... knock a door run

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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