Two juggalos go to an Insane Clown Posse show.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

One night you tell your mom to make you a sandwich, the next day in school you ate a delicious peanut butter and jelly sandwich for lunch

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Sam: Knock knock? You: Who's there? Sam: Sammy Sosa. You: Hi, Sammy Sosa. Sam: Hi.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How do you make a panda toot? You punch it in the stomach.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the aids patient do after he was diagnosed? He had sex with many more people and gave them aids as well.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q: Whats better than ten babies in ten trash cans? A: One baby in ten trash cans

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What does a ghost get when he watches pornography? A boner

thumb_up thumb_down +17

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How did the ruttabaga believe itself to be a ruttabaga? Because it was in fact NOT a ruttabaga, but some self-aware individual with delusions.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did Jesus say to Moses? Jesus doesn't exist. Moses replied, "Do you think I'm stupid, you're standing right next to me!"

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the doctor tell the boy with no arms or legs? I'm sorry, you have terminal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

I am a real homosexual

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock Knock. Go away!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What is the difference between a duck? One leg is both the same.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: What do you call a gray box without a joke in it? A: I don't know but you'd better think of something.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: What can a bench do that a mexican can't? A: Support a family.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the horse fall over? Because I shot it

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's brown, dusty, and full of male? My asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the monkey scream? He was hungry

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why are mexicans such hard workers? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

When does the Trogdor come? In the Niiiiighhhttttt.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

... and so the rabbi says "Don't worry. It was a kosher pickle anyway."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops