a boy walked into a pet store to get his bird some food. they were all out. the bird died.

Your mom is so fat, her pants are starting to get tight.

Two guys walk into a bar, one is treated for a concussion.

What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza? One is a popular Italian food and the other is a human being.

What do Ethiopians do at Christmas ? Starve...

What happens when you cross a dog and a cat? Something.

Q: how many Pollocks does it take to paint a house? A: 100. 99 to spin the house and 1 to hold the paint brush

What did Goldilocks say to the three bears? She asked them how bears make porridge without opposable thumbs.

A kid with no arms or legs is stuck in the desert. Sucks to be him.

What do you call Magic Johnson in a wheel chair? A tragedy, especially considering his past struggles with HIV.

Why did the boy miss a day off school? He was in a coma

Your Mama is so poor. I begin to worry about you and your familys' finacial situation.

Knock Knock Why are you knocking? I have a doorbell.

Why is Michael J Fox so good at using shake weights? Because he is motivated to stay in good physical shape.

I got a joke. What did the Platypus say to the Policeman?" "What a ridiculous question, Platypus's can't talk.

what is the difference between a gay guy and Sarah Dwyer nothing the both like there sex but Sarah is a Guy.

I had sex with the Earth, and out came global warming...Imagine what will happen if i had sex with Obama?

lewis bedford

your mamas so old, her social security number is 1!

-What do you get when you graph the division of x by the square root of 69? - I don't know, what? -I was asking you, as my family's low economic status hinders my ability to buy a graphing calculator.

whats more serious than rape... the holocaust

Why couldn't the Little Boy hear his mother yelling at him? Because his mothers died

A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

What did the deaf man say to the blind man? The deaf man spoke no identifiable words because he could not hear what he was saying. He mumbled a few phrases in jibberish, and the blind man continued looking for his favorite brand of Ramen Noodles at his local Harris Teeter.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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