What did the man say to his wife when he bought a dog? I bought a dog.

you mother is so stupid that it takes her quite a while to understand jokes

What did the father tell his son on his death bed? Nothing. He was hit by a car and was now a vegetable.

Q. How do you make an atheist appreciate life? A. Break his legs.

barack osama

How do you start a Mexican parade? Close off the streets you plan to have the parade on, and be sure to have a decent amount of floats and marching bands.

OK, A plane carrying 200 passengers crashes on the border between America and Canada. Which side of the border do you bury the victims? Well, it would depend on where the passengers where from or what they had stipulated in their living will. I suppose some would be cremated which opens up a whole other can of worms entirely.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Dandelions are yellow, and so are sunflowers.

Why did the black man not tip his waiter? Because she provided terrible service and was undeserving.

What's worse than the holocaust? The Russian Revolution

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest is a former alcoholic, and has the strength to turn around and leave.

how many fish does it take to turn on a lightbulb None, lightbulbs dont work in the ocean

why did every one in the world die? a Train pooped it's pants.

What happens if you throw a red ruby into the black sea? It gets wet.

Why did the passenger plane crash? Well, if not mechanical failure or human error, probably because a bomb was detonated onboard.

the joke below me is not an anti joke

How did Hellen Keller's parents torture her? They made her go to bed when she wasn't very sleepy

Why did the black man win the staring contest? He's good at staring

One time i ate a sandwich it was good

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

Your momma's so fat: She has found a value in relationships beyond an aesthetic level.

No, I don't have ADH...- Oh look, a butterfly!!

Knock Knock Why are you knocking? I have a doorbell.

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Why dont you ask the chicken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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