how do you make sure someone is dead shoot them

So this guy walks into a bar. He is promptly rushed to the hospital due to the risk of brain damage, concussion, or other serious head injury.

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. Yes dyslexic people drink too.

Roses are red Violets are blue Today is your birthday So happy birthday

What's funnier than 24? 25.

Why is the child screaming? Because he just woke up from a bad dream.

alcoholism kills

Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.

Roses are white Violets are white I did it in the garden

Why did the black man win the race? Because he was talented and hardworking.

What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup? Roast Beef Is Made From A Cow And Is Commonly Sold At Your Local Arby's.Pea Soup Is Made From Peas And No One Really Likes Pea Soup Anyway So Its Not Really Sold Anywhere.

If Roger buys 109 candy bars and eats 65, what does he have? Diabetes.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Cos crossing the road usually doesn't work out too well for chickens.

What do you call a Russian civil war? A war in which one side wants to seced from the other.

-What's brown and rhymes with snoop? -Dr. Dre

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? With the technology of compact fluorescent light bulbs they don't go out for much longer, so the question is nearly irrelevant.

I am black.

Why did the little girl fail her test? She had mental retardation.

What do you call a black Arnold Schwarzenegger? Arnold Schwarzenegger.

My dog has no nose, so how does it smell? It can't, I just told you it has no nose.

I tried to post an unfunny punch-line-less joke on anti-joke. It worked and I got tons of emotional affirmation from it and stuff, so thanks.

What do you call a midget sitting in a tree? Jim, because that's his name.

You say you can read me like a book, well the jokes on you. I am not a book.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...