A dog walks into a bar and falls on his butt beacause dogs cant walk.

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What did the plane say after it flew into the World Trade Center on 9/11 Nothing, planes are incapable of speaking.

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Q: why did timmy fall over? A: he was hit by a plane

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your moms so fat she has a heart attack when she walks to the pantry.

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what is brown and sticky? a stick

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What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup? Roast Beef Is Made From A Cow And Is Commonly Sold At Your Local Arby's.Pea Soup Is Made From Peas And No One Really Likes Pea Soup Anyway So Its Not Really Sold Anywhere.

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A plane carries 500 bricks. 1 falls out. How many bricks are left? 499. How do you put an elephant in a fridge in 3 steps? Open the fridge, put in the elephant, and close the fridge. How do you put a deer in a fridge in 4 steps? Open the fridge, take out the elephant, put in the deer, then close the fridge. The Lion King is having a party. All the animals are there except for one; who is it? The deer: He is still in the fridge. An old lady is crossing a swamp, but it is a crocodile swamp. How does she cross? Normally, all the crocodiles are at the Lion King's party The old lady dies at the edge of the swamp. How? A brick falls from the sky and kills her.

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What do you call Justin Bieber having sex with a women? Sex.

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The racist uncle went to attend his nieces bat-mitzvah. Although he is racist, he is smart enough to not speak his mind, for he is in a temple, and may offend many people at the service.

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? Tortilla Chips

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I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus, the divorce papers were filed soon thereafter.

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Three blondes are walking through the woods when the come upon a set of tracks. The blondes stepped away from the tracks to watch the train as it went by.

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A person walks into a store. He goes to a worker an asks "were is the potatos?" . The worker says, there on that shelf.

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I tried to post an unfunny punch-line-less joke on anti-joke. It worked and I got tons of emotional affirmation from it and stuff, so thanks.

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What's not red? No tomatoes.

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Wanna hear a joke the WNBA

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how many jews can you fit in a honda civic 1 in the driver seat, 1 in the passenger seat and 3 in the back properly fixed with safety belts.

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? Tiger Woods is an American professional golfer whose achievements to date rank him among the most successful golfers of all time and Santa Claus is a very jolly fellow who brings gifts to the homes of the good children during the late evening and overnight hours of Christmas Eve.

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drugs.

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A man has 72 cookies, he eats 64 of them. What does he have left? Diabetes.

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Katlin Poladian liked her own status again.

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why does andy thomson speak that slow because he speaks that way

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

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What did Jerry Sandusky get for Christmas? Raped in jail.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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