Roses are red Violets are blue I have clamidia Because Polly shat on me.

Dallas Cowboys

A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released at a nearby park.

A horse walks into a bar...n

what's black, long, and moves around a lot? a van.

Why is little Susie crying? Her entire family is dead.

A man was walking outside at night and he heard thunder and saw lighting so he took out a metal pole.

Chuck Norris can beat an eleven-year-old in a fight.

What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

Q: What did the man with no arms and no legs receive for Christmas? A: Cancer

Why didn't Dave buy his wife a watch for her birthday? Because she already had one.

How did Notre Dame football stay so popular in spite of decades of mediocrity? Catholicism.

Why Did the throw up He was sick

Whats worse than meeting kim kardashian? everything shes the hottest freakin celeb there is

A man and a woman are in bed together and really want to do something, what is that something? Sleep.

If you can dodge a traffic, that probably has little or no relation to how well you can dodge a ball.

Wanna hear a joke? The 19th amendment

Knock Knock? Whos there? akward neighbor. akward neighbor who?

Why did Rose throw the clock out the window? Because she's a moron.

A black policeman and a white policeman work different shifts, one is during the day and one is at night and the both get equal pay.

Why did the dog run away from home? His house burned down and his owners were killed.

Why was johny late to school? He died

The geese of Growmore

Two women were sitting in silence.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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