How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? With the technology of compact fluorescent light bulbs they don't go out for much longer, so the question is nearly irrelevant.

what do a dog and tree have in common? nobody cares when they die

What's brown and sticky? -A stick.

My sister has to take a dump

What did the little boy find when he came home from school? His mother hanging from a tree.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Your worst nightmare!! Ohh.... Do come in it's raining outside.

what did the catholic priest say to the little boy? -probably something about god or jesus because they are in church

What's worse than being raped? Finding out that because you were sexually violated, you are now a victim of unplanned pregnancy and have contracted AIDS and any number of other STD's from the horrible expirence that will forever haunt your nightmares.

What's funny about suicide? Nothing, that's horrible.

Q: what do you call an icy road? A: dangerous

Why did Hitler cross the road? To get to the other side.

What's the difference between uranium and plutonium? Blast radius

What do you get when you cross a cat with a log? I think the better question is why are you mixing those two things together?

Robin, get in the car.

What's the difference between a dead baby in my garage and a Ferrari in my garage? I don't have a Ferrari.

Yo mama so fat that her weight is starting to tear her and your father apart.

Why did dan jump off of the empire state building? -Because Carl pushed him off.

Why is the grass always greener on the other side? because they have a landscaper.

a fat black man walks into an aquarium he enjoyed his day viewing many sea animals while buying a souvenier on his way out.

I jizzed in my pants. It tasted good

Whats 2+2=? ?= CHICKEN

Why did the Jew pick up the loose change on the ground?Because he has to use it for taxi money to get back home.

Aodhan Hearty

How do you start up a good conversation? Wanna have a good conversation?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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