How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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What do you call a Mexican who steals a car? A criminal.

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Why did the man fall down the steps? I shot him in the face.

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Q. How do you make an atheist appreciate life? A. Break his legs.

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Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and smell

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this website...

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What do you call a deaf person? You don't they can't hear you.

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Why does my girlfriend pee standing up? Because he is a man.

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A Blonde walks into a bar. She is an abusive relationship and is drinking her pain away.

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why didnt the deaf man laugh? he was also mute

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Mmmm, donuts

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What did the pedephile do to the young boy? Smiled at him, said hello, and kept on walking.

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What's the difference between a train and a lamp? A lot

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Why did the monkey sit on the toilet? To have a bowelmovement

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One time i ate a sandwich it was good

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Three vampires were at a bar 1 & 2 were drinking and asked the 3rd why he wasn't. He replied, I'm full I found a used tampon on my way here.

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What do you call a diving-board factory worker threatening to jump off the roof? Names.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 1

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Your momma is SOO FAT that I had to call my doctor. He said you should go on a diet and exercise. I called my local gym and gave your mom a 3 months membership. Monday to Friday. Your welcome and good luck.

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What's the best joke of all? YOUR SOCIAL LIFE!!!!!!!

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Yo mama so fat that her weight is starting to tear her and your father apart.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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What do you call a black man in a police car? Officer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road it was out of its coop

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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