What do you call a old guy watching little kids in a pool? a life guard

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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What do you call 3 horses in 1 boat, in the middle of the Dead Sea? Lost

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Hitler is my role model

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What's better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being mentally retarded.

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why was the kid named owen? Because thats what his parents wnted him to be named

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I don't fucking know.

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Why was Brother Jim so loyal to god? Because he had a harpoon through his anal cavity.

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A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah Witness.

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What did the rapist say when he spotted the young girl? I am going to rape you!

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Liars go to hell! -God

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Whats the funniest part about 911? Over 1,000 People Died

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Why was the blonde woman crying? -because she witnessed her infant get sucked into a jet engine and was very sad.

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Five guys one rape.

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what happened to the mexican who dropped his ice cream at work? He got a raise, won the $5 billion jackpot, was given ten car dealerships, then died.

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some one knocked on tims door, at the same exact time, someone died in africa

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if you are what you eat then arent pornstars considered vaginas?

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Lets go Detroit Pistons!

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GooglePlus.

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Q: What's annoying and doesn't smoke? A: AIDS

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. Why did the car crash? Because the driver was a loaf of bread. Why did the boat sink? Because the pirates attacked.

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The geese of Growmore

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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