How do you know when there's a terrorist in an airport? There's a camel in the parking lot.

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What did the jew get for christmas nothing because he doesnt celebrate christmas.

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Why did Rose throw the clock out the window? Because she's a moron.

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What is the difference between a baby and a tampoline? You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.

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Whats big, tall and fat? Most of America.

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3 black men walk into a bar. They order their drinks, tip the bartender, and could not have been more courteous.

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Women's rights

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I have the heart of a child... in a jar on my desk.

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No, I don't have ADH...- Oh look, a butterfly!!

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Three vampires were at a bar 1 & 2 were drinking and asked the 3rd why he wasn't. He replied, I'm full I found a used tampon on my way here.

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What do you call a Jewish lawyer, who is happily married to a woman, but goes and sees a man on the side? A gay Jewish lawyer who cheats on his fake wife.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Your neighbor My neighbor who? I already told you, it's pronounced "Wu". I'm very sorry, Mr. Wu

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A Horse walks into a bar. Bartender:why the long face? Horse:I have terminal cancer.

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RATE THIS JOKE THUMBS UP FOR TEN COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES RATE THIS JOKE THUMBS UP FOR TEN COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES

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Jim and Larry work together. Jim works hard, and Larry is a bit of a prankster. One day, Jim is having a rather rough day, and Larry looks to cheer him up with a good-natured joke. Knowing that Jim's wife prepares dinner for him every night of the week, he calls her and tells her that their boss has decided to pay for a dinner out, that she should take the day off and just get ready for Jim to come home and pick her up. Larry will later follow up by calling a pizza delivery place and having them send a special no hard feeling message with two large delicious pizzas. He forgets to call the pizza delivery man until later that night, after which it's too late and he thinks "I'll just explain the joke to Jim tomorrow." And goes peacefully to sleep. Arriving home and finding that dinner is not prepared, Jim savagely beats his wife.

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Wanna hear a joke? Toyota

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Why did the man loose his balls? he had testicular cancer and had to get them removed.

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What's worse than 9 dead babies nailed to a tree? 1 dead baby nailed to 9 trees.

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What's huge, gray, and has a trunk and wings. An elephant with wings glued to it.

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If a midget is mentally retarded and always late for work, is it okay to call him a little tardy?

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i have 2 penises

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Potato salad

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Why did the black man sit at the back of the bus? Because all of the seats were taken by other people of different races. Luckily for the man, there was one empty seat at the back which he was able to sit on to make himself comfortable.

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How many gays does it take to turn a lightbulb? 1

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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