in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the blonde do when she found out one is most likely to get in a car accident within 6 miles of the home? She drove more carefully in her neighborhood.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is the difference between the number 20 and 21 1

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Icecream

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is brown and sticky? A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How much does a Mexican Parade cost? A Nickel

thumb_up thumb_down +1

When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

if life gives you lemons, make lemonade. unless you only get one lemon, then it really hard to make a good glass..and for that matter, who said you had a juicer? it would be really hard to just squeeze the juice out of a lemon. on top of that, what kind of situation am I in that I would need lemonade? let's say if life gives you lemons, determine the best use of them based on need, local weather and economic status

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What does a man like. food.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did a guy with a lisp, v-neck, and piercings pee while sitting down? His joints hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the little girl drop her ice cream cone? She got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why do birds suddenly appear? If you were more observant, you would notice they usually approach gradually.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the blind, def , dumb kid get for Christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How many kids with ADHD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Popsicle!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

how many scrubbers does it take to change a lightbulb 2, 1 to change it , and 1 to make it smell like urine.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Womens rights.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

how do you stop a train? you cant..

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a old guy watching little kids in a pool? a life guard

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: The holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Satan called. I put him on hold.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

thumb_up thumb_down -13

yo momma is so tall shes tall

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How you make a duck cry? Raping it. How you make it shut up? Killing it. Why did no one helped the duck? Because the duck has no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops