Roses are rde, violets are bule, I am dyslexic, how about you?

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What did the mollusk say to the sea cucumber? I don't know. Neither of them can talk.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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What's the difference between a train and a lamp? A lot

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Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

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What do you call burt and ernie if they were black?? A couple of n*ggers

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A woman walks into a bar. She is pregnant and gives her baby fetal alcohol syndrome.

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Why couldn't the blonde divide 5 by 0? Because it's impossible to divide by 0.

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What's worse than the holocaust? The Russian Revolution

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Q: what do you call an icy road? A: dangerous

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What's a Mexican who walks down the street called? A pedestrian.

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Do you think retarded people know that they are retarded? I don't know, you tell me. Wait a second....did you just call me retarded? They are clueless.

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69

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it damn well felt like it.

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Whats better than a panda? A panda with an ice cream cone.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven beats his wife.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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I jizzed in my pants. It tasted good

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What is the difference between a black guy and a bucket of crap? Well, one consists of two inanimate objects (a bucket and feces) and the other is a human being of African/African-American descent. As you can see there really is no real comparison here.

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Why doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team? They do, they just choose not to compete certain years.

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Knock Knock COME IN!!!!

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What happened when the tree fell It killed someone

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What's pink and smells like a red rose? A pink rose.

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what do you call a cucumber that is wearing a dress.... an asian lady

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops