A black man walks into a bar, to get a drink.

What do you call a used garden tool? A dirty hoe (not ho)

What did the man say to the atractive woman? Hi

Q) What is the difference between an elephant and a toaster? A) Do you seriously not know the difference between an elephant... and a toaster?

What did the mother give her family for christmas? Nothing. The family is Jewish.

What did Joel say to the mouse. We're both dead mouses.

justin littleton. nuff said

What's the difference between peanut butter and jam ? Among many things, one is made with peanut butter, the other with fruits.

Two business men, a priest and three boys are on a plane which is going down. There are only three parachutes. One business man says that they should allow the children to have the parachutes as they have long lives ahead of them. The other business man says screw the children. The priest looks up at the second business man. After a short but heated argument they all agree to let the children have the parachutes. The three children then proceed to jump out of the plane with the parachutes. The two business men and the priest watch as they descend upon the earth. The plane then crashes into a mountain, killing the business men and the priest. Once the boys were safely on land they went back to their daily lives in their individual homes. Turns out a serial killer had escaped from prison, all three children were found dead the next morning, the cause of death of course being that each had contracted some form of a sexually transmitted disease from the priest.

Why did the cat cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

How do you leave a man in suspense...

In Soviet Russia, everyone leads a perfectly normal life.

Yo mama's so stupid, I told her it was chili outside so she went outside with a spoon.

What do you call a dragon that doesn't breathe fire? A Griffin.

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey!!!" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

kennah campion... being nice

Wife: 'what did I put into the washing machine ?' Husband: laundry

A. Knock-knock. B. Who's there? A. Hey, your doorbell's broken.

whats funnier than the boy with no arms and legs getting cancer? lebron playing basketball

Matt swam through watter. Gaby drowned on dry land.

Why did the older man begin to walk faster after a black man started walking towards him? He was late for work.

guy 1- damn its hot in here guy 2- then turn on the damn fireplace

why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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