So I walked upstairs and I told the guy, "No." And he then asks, "Why?"

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Why was the baseball player arrested after stealing a base? Because he pulled out a knife and stabbed the shortstop in the chest.

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Knock Knock Whos there? smell map smell map who?...really? I was in the middle of a phone call with my paraplegic wife's doctor, who was telling me that her condition has gotten worse and doesn't think she'll make it to the end of the month. You interrupted that in order to get me to say something that sounded like "smell my poo". Forget being allowed into my house, you should be worried about being allowed into heaven. Hopefully as you walk home today, someone will murder you.

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Black Poeple

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Chuck Norris is a normal man.

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Knock knock! "It's unlocked"

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of the ocean? Dead.

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A purple kangaroo hops into a bar. There is no such thing as a purple kangaroo. The end.

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what do a dog and tree have in common? nobody cares when they die

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Relax, and I do not mean as in hypnotic "relax as you do not not... Okay I used it again I am just joking" Nice, so are they like pretty doubles or not?

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What happened at the finish line of the marathon? People collapsed in exhaustion, it was a marathon.

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Do you know what Ethiopian food tastes like? Neither do they

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What is a girl with one leg called ( iliene )

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What's worse than the holocaust? The Russian Revolution

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whats the best thing about fukkin twentyone year olds...theres twenty of them

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What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

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this website...

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What happend when Chuck Norris did a push up? He did one push up.

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Knock, Knock! Who's there? Matt. Matt, who? You're friend Matt that you texted twenty minutes ago telling me to come over.

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Mmmm, donuts

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Q: Whatcha doin?? A:Ur mom. . .

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How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

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What is the difference between you and Chuck Norris? You're reading this and he's probably doing something productive.

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Real jokes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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