A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar, they then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, peace, harmony and understaning between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, essentially they are all the same, and want happy existences with family and friends, and that equality and peace between religions should be a prime focus of religious institutions and governments. They then band together to criticize aetheists, who present a much more probable explanation for why the Universe is the way it is. An eavesdropper then mulls over the idea that the various religions represented behind him are willing to debate philosophical standpoints, so long as their monotheistic beliefs are not contradicted.

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Why did Jack and Jill fall down the hill? Because they were donuts

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Shes dead.

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I man walks into a bar. He got drunk.

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milly, milly, milly, cat

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its shoulders.

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A fat man walks into a bar. There is a 70% chance his mom is fat.

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What's the difference between a train and a lamp? A lot

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because after death the body loses control of muscles and the monkey could no longer grasp the branch with his tail

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A man hanged himself, leaving a note. Nobody found him, nor the note. Nobody cared for him.

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Why did the lion get lost? -The jungle is massive

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What is big and white, not the moon CC

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A man walks into a doctor's office. He is diagnosed with cancer. After three years he dies.

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why did jimmy fall off the swing? because he was a tree.

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What do you call a man who just died 5 minutes ago? Dead.

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Why was the Amish man dead? Because he fell off of his fridge, while trying to screw in a light bulb.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road... Because he got hurt last week while crossing the road.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar He sits down and has some trouble reading the menu but orders a beer

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Freedom of Speech

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Roses are flowers jordan does it for hours xxxxif ya know what i mean

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Q:What happens to an elephant if he falls from a building with 10 floors? A:He dies

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What is the difference between a Mac user and a PC user? The operating system that they prefer to use.

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what did the 0 say to the 8 nice belt

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An Irishman stays home

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops