Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the city on the other side. He hoped he could find work in one of the city's cheap factories. He needed money for his family: he could not bear to see them slowly starve for any longer. If he could get a lowly-paid job he may be able to just sustain them. But he knew it could not last for long. He would probably die on the streets or in the slums, cold, lonely and starving. But it was a risk worth taking - he could not see his own family waste slowly away like so many of his friends had.

What is brown and has 3 legs? My severely injured cat.

Mexicans working in an office

That's unfortunate.

Why did Suzy drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Suzy!

what makes white men feel embarrassed and and ashamed? when they find out their girllfriend has been sleeping with a black man.

why did the mexican cross the road? to catch its bus on the other side

"I had the worst day ever!" "Was it worse than 9/11?"

Chuck Norris can fly around the world in under 2 days. In an airplane.

What's grosser than gross? Grosser. What's grosser than that? Grossest.

There once was a man from Nantucket Whose name was Mike

why did the man have solar panels on his house? because he had some money left over cos he won the lottery

Whats black and white and red all over? An interracial aborted fetus

once there was a man named steve. he happily sniffs pot every day after work. especially on sundays. one day, his family finds him sniffing pot. they are disgusted and disappointed in his bad decisions. so they join him

When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

Why was the blonde woman crying? -because she witnessed her infant get sucked into a jet engine and was very sad.

Q: What did the cop say to the deaf man? A: Nothing worth hearing about.

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

A black man, hispanic man, and white man walk in to a bar. They are all friends. They enjoy a few beers together then call a taxi to take them home because it is irresponsible to operate a motor vehicle while under the influence of alcohol or other drugs.

what do a dog and tree have in common? nobody cares when they die

What do nine out of ten people enjoy? Gang rape.

roses are red facebook is blue you look f**kable so i'll add you by: matt

no

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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