If a midget is mentally retarded and always late for work, is it okay to call him a little tardy?

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Herman Cain

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What's brown and wears glasses? A poo with bad eyesight.

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Why was the truck covered in blood? The chicken tried crossing the road

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A baby seal walks into a club

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What do you call a black man in a police car? Officer.

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What is 18 inches long and makes a woman scream all night? Crib death.

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your mamas so old, her social security number is 1!

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What do you call a man who just died 5 minutes ago? Dead.

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A jew and a black man walk into a bar the black man orders a screwdriver. The jrw asks him why did you order a screw driver.? The black man answer black:I enjoy screw drivers.

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What has lips and smells like a fish? A fish.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running. From the forest. That hell hole. He had got away, but he could remember. The darkness. The silence. Until the unmistakable scream of the guns and then- The Running. The Screaming. The Blood, oh the blood. Seeing Charlie. Oh, that damned soul Charlie. The bullet went right- But that was long ago. So long. But sometimes, in the silence, Chicken remembers. The Running. The Screaming. The Blood. And he screams.

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How do you get a bunch of Pokémon onto a bus? You tell them to ride a bus

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What did Sally get for Christmas? Nothing, Sally is dead

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What does Chuck Norris do when he breaks his legs? he calls a doctor.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Hypothetical questions are a waste of time and you are not achieving your full potential by reading this during work.

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Penis

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Yo momma's so short, it's probably because she's in a wheelchair.

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Guess what? Chicken butt

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Why did the man throw his alarm clock out the window? Because he has anger management issues.

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Dead babies.

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Today I had sex with a married man, but thats OK he's my husband

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A businessman walks out of a store with his new haircut he was bald.

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What did Joel say to the mouse. We're both dead mouses.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops