Three kids were waiting in line at a camp. One said how long is the wait. The other two said i hope its long. They were waiting in line for the gas chambers at auchwitz

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A priest, a rabbi and a shaman walk into a bar. Except there is no rabbi and there is no shaman and the bar is actually my 8th birthday party priest is molesting me. And the priest is my dad. My dad molested me. A lot...

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Q: What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas. A: A specially modified coffin.

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Your mom is so fat, she has crippling depression and has tried killing herself three times.

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Love is in the air? Wrong. Nitrogen, Oxygen and Carbon Dioxide are in the air.

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I have no joke. u mad?

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What is the longest word in the English language? SMILES: there is a mile between the first and last letters!"

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why did the chicken cross the road? I dunno.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a cat? Neither did she

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why was the kid named owen? Because thats what his parents wnted him to be named

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if it's friday, it must be China

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Roses are red violets are next thing you know my D*** is in you

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Q: What did the guy say to his girlfriend? A: "I like turtles!" Then he smacks her ass.

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james schmitt whats your last name

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A: make me a sandwich woman! B: your a sandwich.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue It is Valentines Day So I had to get them for you or we would get into a big fight, which will end up with me on the couch.

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If you have two berries in one hand, and three in the other, what do you get when you put them together? Five.

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your moms so fat she has a heart attack when she walks to the pantry.

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What's the difference between Stevie Wonder and Kevin Bacon? There's none. Neither of them is a taxi driver.

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Your muffins smell good! Oh you is just nasty.

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Why was the blonde woman crying? -because she witnessed her infant get sucked into a jet engine and was very sad.

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What does spongebob do to get high. Nothing, spongebob doesnt exsist.

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Six hasn't been the same since Vientnamn

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A plane carries 500 bricks. 1 falls out. How many bricks are left? 499. How do you put an elephant in a fridge in 3 steps? Open the fridge, put in the elephant, and close the fridge. How do you put a deer in a fridge in 4 steps? Open the fridge, take out the elephant, put in the deer, then close the fridge. The Lion King is having a party. All the animals are there except for one; who is it? The deer: He is still in the fridge. An old lady is crossing a swamp, but it is a crocodile swamp. How does she cross? Normally, all the crocodiles are at the Lion King's party The old lady dies at the edge of the swamp. How? A brick falls from the sky and kills her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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