I am black.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

So I walked upstairs and I told the guy, "No." And he then asks, "Why?"

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Chuck Norris is a normal man.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why was the baseball player arrested after stealing a base? Because he pulled out a knife and stabbed the shortstop in the chest.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar, they then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, peace, harmony and understaning between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, essentially they are all the same, and want happy existences with family and friends, and that equality and peace between religions should be a prime focus of religious institutions and governments. They then band together to criticize aetheists, who present a much more probable explanation for why the Universe is the way it is. An eavesdropper then mulls over the idea that the various religions represented behind him are willing to debate philosophical standpoints, so long as their monotheistic beliefs are not contradicted.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

a woman asked her husband, why havent you been talking to me? the man answers, you are having an affair so i ignored you and only talked to the girl im cheating on you with. you should know your a horrible person

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Q: Why cant Helen Keller drive? A: Because shes dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Lightening never strikes the same place twice. But it killed both my parents.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

A man walks into a bar. [Insert punchline here.]

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Do you know what Ethiopian food tastes like? Neither do they

thumb_up thumb_down +37

whats the best thing about fukkin twentyone year olds...theres twenty of them

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Dandelions are yellow, and so are sunflowers.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Knock, Knock! Who's there? Matt. Matt, who? You're friend Matt that you texted twenty minutes ago telling me to come over.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Whats big, tall and fat? Most of America.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch!" Passersby notice the man is blind, which caused him not to notice the bar. He later died in the hospital from severe head trauma

thumb_up thumb_down +35

I'm on the seafood diet. A large proportion of my daily food intake is fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

what is white and sticky? glue.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

nathan palmer has a big head !

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the man eat the apple? Because he was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

why are these jokes so funny? why are u so fat bitch

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops