I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

Three jewish men are standing in at a bar. Its getting late and the bartender tells the three men its time to go home. As they walk out to the street, the bartender asks if they will be needing a ride home. Of course these three men had a few drinks, but did not live too far down the road, so they decided to walk. They pass the first mans house and he goes in to see his wife and three kids. They walk past the second mans house and he goes in to see his fiance leaving only one man left. He gets to his house, unlocks the door and goes inside only to find a note on the counter. He gets onto his computor and see that he forgot his wallet at the bar. He goes downstairs and walks out the door only to find himself falling into a giant pit. After falling for a while he starts thinking about his life. Then he remebered that he wasnt jewish.

A blond, a brunette and a redhead are all trapped on a desert island. They work together and manage to survive until help arrives.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Cos crossing the road usually doesn't work out too well for chickens.

Jeff was a very hard working accountant, after a very long day he drove to burger king, he looked up at the menu and said to the lady. I'll have a burger please.

Why was the blond looking at the orange juice box? Because she was reading the nutritional content of orange juice.

GooglePlus.

some one knocked on tims door, at the same exact time, someone died in africa

So I walked upstairs and I told the guy, "No." And he then asks, "Why?"

I am black.

A black guy walks up to a drug dealer. He asked the drug dealer for directions and went on with his life.

What did Bobby get for Christmas? Nothing, Bobby is an orphan and has no friends.

a woman asked her husband, why havent you been talking to me? the man answers, you are having an affair so i ignored you and only talked to the girl im cheating on you with. you should know your a horrible person

Whats sad about a black women killing herself? She was my mother

A gay guy walks into a bar. Nothing is said to him, because homosexuality is accepted in this area.

Anti jokes are funny

Whats big, hairy, and super long? My big toe you pervert.

How can you avoid being hit by a car? Don't get in the way.

What is the hardest part of a vegtable? The wheel chair 0.o

What do you call a monkey? A monkey.

What's long and hard on a black man? First grade.

Two peanuts are walking down a dark alley. One was a honey roasted.

Yo mama so fat even Dora couldn't explore her!

shabalabadingdong JLR

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...