What does a ghost get when he watches pornography? A boner

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Pandas Everywhere!!!

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Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

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This guy was driving in a car with a blonde. He told her to stick her head out the window and see if the blinker worked. She stuck her head out and said, yes.

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Why did the penguin cross the road? Chicken

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A Starfish walks into a bar. He sits down next to a man with a concussion. Q: What did the man say? A: Nothing because he was in a concussion and was no longer able to say words.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting attacked by an evil demonic llama.

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Where was little suzie the day after the house fire? At the hospital, being treated for minor burns.

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A Man walks into a bar and orders a scotch. His alcoholism is tearing his family apart

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hi ....................... oh i thought this was a chat room !!!!!!!

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what did the man with no legs get for Christmas? A piano

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a women picks up her phone and screams! There were 3 missed calls from her mother-inlaw

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What do you call a black person in a pool? A black person swimming.

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One time I was playing hide and seek with grandma but I couldn't seem to find her. I asked my sister for help and she told me she was hiding in the living room on the shelf. I went into the living room but all I saw was a vase on the shelf. Grandma probably didn't know the game was over so I opened the vase to tell her. To this day she hasn't come out of the vase.

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What did the cheese say to his friend, who was also a cheese, before the cheese took a picture? ''Cheese''.

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What's brown a sticky? -A stick

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cheese

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I had a dream I watched Inception.

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when does the phrase "time heals all wounds" not apply? to people with fatal wounds.

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A peice of dust floats into a bar. Its a peice of dust so no one notices it.

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corey is a nipplepotomus

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Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

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What does a good joke get for Christmas? no laughs.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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