How did the guy drown if he wasn't in water? A shark threw up on him

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a mexican, an asian and a black are all in a car, who's the driver? their friend bill who offered to take them to the upcoming three days grace concert.

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Why did sally fall off her swingset? Because she was hit with a refrigerator.

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What's worse than anti-joke.com? Non-anti-joke.com! Louis

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What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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What is the longest word in the English language? SMILES: there is a mile between the first and last letters!"

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a black father

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Two men are sitting in a bar. They finish their drinks and pay the bill before leaving.

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Hey your name is really Tifa? Sorry, I hate scheming, but in this kind of situation I have to play things safe, I have a wife to take care off, I mean it, I really hate it. Anyway, I got your number, location everything, now if you did send people to harm or even worse kill me, you wont be doing that again, trust me, if I die of an assault, you die next, whoever you are.

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Hitler

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why was the kid named owen? Because thats what his parents wnted him to be named

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Hello world

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What's more satistfying then good sex? A nice loud, stinky fart.

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If Pythagoras was racist, he would have made hypotenuses.

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How do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the Brake

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What's the difference between a porsche and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a porsche in my garage.

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Q. Why did billy die? A. Becuase everyone dies in life

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What did the fat man buy at Mcdonalds? A salad, hes on a diet

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A murderer takes you hostage. He lists three ways that you will die, but he lets you choose your death: 1. A bullet in your head. 2. A knife in your heart. 3. A lethal injection. What do you choose? It doesn't matter. You're dead.

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What happened when the terrorist with a bomb went into a school. He blew up and everyone died.

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Two small boys are walking in a schoolyard. One of the boys sits down under a tree looking distraught. The other asks him "Well whats the matter Eddy?" "Every time I walk to my bus-stop in the morning, Jimmy Krugan, pushes me down and takes my money. " The first boy thinks for sec.. "Well here's what you do Ed; go to your Dad's shed and grab a 2X4, paint it bright blue. In the morning, walk to school with it under your jacket and when Jimmy starts in on you give him a good wallop. He wont be bothering you anymore." The following day the boys are in the yard again. Eddy is seen under the tree seeming just as distraught. Confused, the boy asks him.. "Well Ed, did you do what I told you?" "No."

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what did the man say when he got in the car?nothing he lost his voice in an accient that morning

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What does spongebob do to get high. Nothing, spongebob doesnt exsist.

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What is bad about being black and Jewish? Your gonna have to sit in the back of the oven

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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