Yo mama so fat even Dora couldn't explore her!

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why are these jokes so funny? why are u so fat bitch

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Did you hear about the woman you got hit by a car? The Driver was intoxicated and had no control over his faculties which cause him to careen off of the road and hit this poor soul as she patiently waited at a crosswalk.

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Wher did suzy go after the explosion? everywhere

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What did the lion say the the zebra? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak and therefore could not make conversation with said zebra, hunted it down, killed it, and shared it with his pride of 27.

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What do you get when you cross a porcupine with party balloons? Unhappy kids

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Once upon a time there was beautiful princess, ONCE!

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why are elephants gray? to tell them apart from blueberries.

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Freddie Mercurys teeth

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What's brown and sticky? A stick

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What did the first muffin say to the second? Nothing. Muffins can't talk, you idiot.

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What did the dog say when his family's grandmother came back to life from the dead and ate everyone? Nothing. This is a highly improbable situation, and furthermore, dogs cannot speak.

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A gorilla walks into the DMV to apply for a drivers license. Turns out it was just some guy in a gorilla suit doing a prank. Everybody instantly realized this at the time since gorillas aren't indigenous to the local area. They guy responsible was charged with a small fine for public mischief.

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Why did Bob fall off the swing? Because Bob's a fish.

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I'm not racist... Racism is a crime, and crime is for black people.

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This one time at band camp....I put a flute in it's proper storage compartment.

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Why are mexicans such hard workers? I don't know.

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Your momma is so fat that she has really high cholesterol but also an undoubtedly warm personality.

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A horse walks in a bar. Several people leave seeing the potential danger in the situation.

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There are 2 muffins sitting in an oven. Neither of the muffins say anything because muffins can't talk.

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Duncan Traywick is hilarious.

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Like Harry Potter? Like anti-jokes? Check these out: http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38139-why-did-dumbledore-fall-off-the-astronomy-tower-because-snape-killed-him http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38140-knock-knock-who-s-there-you-know-you-know-who-call-him-voldemort-fear-of-a-name-increases-fear-of-the http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38141-a-black-kid-an-asian-kid-and-a-jewish-kid-walk-into-a-barrier-they-are-students-at-hogwarts-school

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your watch? About 3:26 PM Eastern Standard Time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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