a man walks into a bar, sits down, sighs and says, "i had the worst day ever." the bartender replies with, "worse than 9/11?" the man then says "well, 9/11 wasn't that bad."

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A englishmen an irishmen and a ginger walk off a bridge gingers have no souls

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Knock, knock Who's there? Die bitch

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-What's brown and rhymes with snoop? -Dr. Dre

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When my Xbox died, my girlfriend said: "Finally, you can treat me the same way you treated that thing!" So I tapped her so hard that she died

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What do nine out of ten people enjoy? Gang rape.

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Knock knock. Whos there? To get to the other side.

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A purple kangaroo hops into a bar. There is no such thing as a purple kangaroo. The end.

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Two muffins are in an oven. Although they both possess the extraordinary ability to speak, strangely each remains silent, apparently lost in their own thoughts. Thus nobody has any reason to think they are any different than any other muffins. Later after they've been baked and allowed to cool, they are sold to a woman who eats them along with a small salad. She enjoys their chewy, hearty texture, and lightly sweet taste. She is completely unaware of what amazing discovery has just been lost to science.

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar, they then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, peace, harmony and understaning between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, essentially they are all the same, and want happy existences with family and friends, and that equality and peace between religions should be a prime focus of religious institutions and governments. They then band together to criticize aetheists, who present a much more probable explanation for why the Universe is the way it is. An eavesdropper then mulls over the idea that the various religions represented behind him are willing to debate philosophical standpoints, so long as their monotheistic beliefs are not contradicted.

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a black guy and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? a taxi driver.

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Knock knock! "It's unlocked"

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Black Poeple

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its shoulders.

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The government makes a good decision

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What did the little boy find when he came home from school? His mother hanging from a tree.

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you know what sucks more than getting raped by a gorilla? getting raped by two gorillas.

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What was the latino gardener doing? Working hard to keep his job in these tough economic times.

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What runs faster than a dead baby? Almost everything.

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What happend when Chuck Norris did a push up? He did one push up.

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Why does my girlfriend pee standing up? Because he is a man.

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What did the jew get for christmas nothing because he doesnt celebrate christmas.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your worst nightmare!! Ohh.... Do come in it's raining outside.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Hodor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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