Why does my girlfriend pee standing up? Because he is a man.

What has two legs and is red all over? Half a cat.

Whats big, tall and fat? Most of America.

What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

what is white and sticky? glue.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Hodor

So Mel Gibson walks into a bar, and then everyone left.

The chicken came before the egg. Because eggs are an unborn chicken, and it is impossible for an unborn chicken to ejaculate.

Why....... Because.

Real jokes.

What is the hardest part of a vegtable? The wheel chair 0.o

How do you win a war? Drop a fridge on your enemies.

A hiker gets lost on a trail and ends up wondering deep into the woods. He comes upon an amish farm. He knocks on the door and an amish man answers. The hiker explains his predicament, and the amish man says "sure you can stay in barn, but promise me one thing, don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course I won't". He then goes to the barn. Right before the hiker falls asleep. The amish farmer comes in and says "make sure you don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course not". So the next morning the hiker is rested, well fed and is about to leave when the amish man approaches and says, "Thank you being decent and christian like."

What did your father say before he died? Nothing, he's already dead

where's waldo? in a picture book.

What's huge, gray, and has a trunk and wings. An elephant with wings glued to it.

What did the sexually promiscuous man get for Christmas? AIDS.

3 ducks are sitting in a pond. one with blonde feathers. one with brown feathers, and one with white feathers. A Transvestite Inbred Donkey Man kills them instantly.

What did Tommy's father tell him on Christmas? Nothing, he was violently stabbed to death on Christmas Eve.

A policeman asks a suspect in a murder investigigation about his alibi. The suspect gives him a solid alibi. The suspect go's home to his wife and have dinner.

Whats 2+2=? ?= CHICKEN

Im getting sick of holocaust jokes cant you Nazi Annefrankly they are dumb

How did the jew reply to the racist comment? Judaism is not a race, it's a religion.

What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? I cried when I cut up the onion.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...