What do you do to a duck with no bill? Please, leave the duck alone, it's bad enough for him having no bill.

Why did Ashley run out of juice in her house? Because she drank it all!

Knock knock. Who's there? President. President who? The President of the United States.

A Mexican and a black person both jump off a bridge, who hits the water first? Neither, as all matter falls at the same rate, regardless of weight, size, or ethnicity.

What did the man say to Hitler? You're a douche

Lockerbie bombing

What do you call a racist guy surrounded by a gang of black pepole? Dead.

what is the difference between a gay guy and Sarah Dwyer nothing the both like there sex but Sarah is a Guy.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot turned into a loaf of bread.

what did the homeless man get for Christmas? Cancer

Jim and Larry work together. Jim works hard, and Larry is a bit of a prankster. One day, Jim is having a rather rough day, and Larry looks to cheer him up with a good-natured joke. Knowing that Jim's wife prepares dinner for him every night of the week, he calls her and tells her that their boss has decided to pay for a dinner out, that she should take the day off and just get ready for Jim to come home and pick her up. Larry will later follow up by calling a pizza delivery place and having them send a special no hard feeling message with two large delicious pizzas. He forgets to call the pizza delivery man until later that night, after which it's too late and he thinks "I'll just explain the joke to Jim tomorrow." And goes peacefully to sleep. Arriving home and finding that dinner is not prepared, Jim savagely beats his wife.

amy copied adams haircut :0

Knock knock. Who's there? I am.

A man was driving to work when he realized he hadn't told his wife happy anniversary. He turned the car around to head back home only to remember that their anniversary was on Friday, not Thursday. The man shared some nervous laughter with himself as the radio played in the background. He continued on toward work and had a run of the mill day meeting with potential clients.

What smells like curry and bombs? A dead Indian

Why did the old man fart?? Because he had gas

What is the first step in making an ugly girl pretty? Shave her genitals.

why did helen keller fall down the stairs A; i pushed her

Why did Justin Bieber smile in his mug shot? He did not understand the consequences of his horrible actions that could have killed many innocent men, woman, or children and, in jail, there could be very dangerous people living there.

What's brown and wears glasses? A poo with bad eyesight.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <<

In Soviet Russia! People were much more finacially secure than they are now.

A policeman asks a suspect in a murder investigigation about his alibi. The suspect gives him a solid alibi. The suspect go's home to his wife and have dinner.

How do you know when a guy wants to have sex with you? When he rapes you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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