Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree Perpresher

What did Sally get for Christmas? Nothing, Sally is dead

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive Cause she's a woman

What did Tommy's father tell him on Christmas? Nothing, he was violently stabbed to death on Christmas Eve.

What's worse than getting raped? Getting raped twice.

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

What do you call an elderly women who after the death of her late husband had many enconters witb men? A whore.

Q:Whats the difference between a dead dog and a dead baby? A:The dog has skidmarks in front of it -RDV

Why was the boy un-able to talk He was retarded

Lacrosse

What did Joel say to the mouse. We're both dead mouses.

What does Chuck Norris do when he breaks his legs? he calls a doctor.

Whats the difference between a horse and a pile of wheat? Its a pile of wheat.

Justin Littleton getting laid.

Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

there where 3 guys at a magic pool. if you jump in and say anything it appears in the pool. the first guy runs, jumps and says money!! he gets a bunch of money. the second guy runs, jumps and says gold!! he gets a bunch of gold. the third guy runs, slips says SHIT!!!! and lands in the pool.

This one time at band camp....I put a flute in it's proper storage compartment.

Q: How many dead people does it take to change a light bulb? A: Trick question...i have sex with them in the dark

Your dad is so dumb he tried to put M&M's in abc order

What is the difference between a Mac user and a PC user? The operating system that they prefer to use.

Your mom is so fat she should be concerned about her increased risk of heart failure.

a women picks up her phone and screams! There were 3 missed calls from her mother-inlaw

What is long, erect, and 12 inches long? A ruler.

The new pickup line. The human body has 206 bones in it. I have broken one of them, please take me to a hospital.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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