Character one: What did the blond say to the horse? Character two: you spelled blonde wrong.

I am black.

I used to love Christmas Until Santa woke me up and told me my dad didn't exist....

Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and smell

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side why didnt the chicken cross back? for the first time in his life, Clucky the chicken, felt liberated. his cruel life flashed before his eyes, forcing him to remember all the bad tines he had spent on the McKinley farm. all the eggs stolen from him, watching all his friends being taken for slaughter. it all came back. from the other side of the road, Clucky saw a place he never wanted to go back to, a place he wanted to forget. the day he chose not to cross back was the first real day in Clucky's life.

a woman asked her husband, why havent you been talking to me? the man answers, you are having an affair so i ignored you and only talked to the girl im cheating on you with. you should know your a horrible person

why did the blond cross the road? she doesnt know either

A dog walks into a bar. The bartender asks the dog "what will ya have?" The bartender is then recognized as The Dog Whisperer

Why don't seagulls live in the bay? Because then they'd be bagels

what's worse than two dead babies? three dead babies.

A man walks into a store, and says to the cashier: "I'd like to buy 6 fridges". The cashier says: "Why do you need that many fridges?" The man says: "I'm an antelope!"

Knock Knock? Whos there? akward neighbor. akward neighbor who?

What's worse than being raped? Finding out that because you were sexually violated, you are now a victim of unplanned pregnancy and have contracted AIDS and any number of other STD's from the horrible expirence that will forever haunt your nightmares.

Whats worse then reading the same joke over and over again? Getting mutilated by a cupcake.

A purple kangaroo hops into a bar. There is no such thing as a purple kangaroo. The end.

BIG PENIS

What do you call a man with no legs? A paraplegic.

Why did the man cross the inerstate? Well, he only got half way till he got hit by a truck, but he wanted to, it was suicide. oh ya, it wasnt a man it was a chicken. oh well. They are both dead.

milly, milly, milly, cat

Why did the mechanic sleep under a car? He had narcolepsy.

Whats worse than a dead baby? 6 million dead Jews.

Why was the Amish man dead? Because he fell off of his fridge, while trying to screw in a light bulb.

How do you get Pikachu on a bus? You don't, Pikachu is a fictional character therefore doesn't exist

Whats better than a panda? A panda with an ice cream cone.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...