A dyslexic pimp buys a warehouse.

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justin littleton. nuff said

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what do you call a fish with no gills? I dont know what youd call that creature...but its no fish.

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Q:Where does a woman work at if she has a job? A: IHOP!!!

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The number one killer of daredevil's is the ground.

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An Englishman, Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a pub where they are presented with a situation, the Englishman and Scotsman react appropriately but the Irishman does something foolish.

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar. Someone asks for his autograph to which he replies. "Sure"

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r Dbags n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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How did two Jews react when they saw a quarter on the sidewalk? They agreed to donate it to charity.

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Why did the sixteen year old girl get an abortion? She didn't want the responsibility of raising a child

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What did the first muffin say to the second? Nothing. Muffins can't talk, you idiot.

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Q: Why was the man hit by the train? A: He was tied to the rail road tracks...

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japan

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what do Asian people eat? what Asian people eat.

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You are on a street. there are 4 houses, a red one, a blue one, a green one, and a white one. The red man lives in the red house, the blue man lives in the blue house. the green man lives in the green house. Who lives in the white house? The president

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The WNBA.

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what do you call 4 terrorists going off a cliff in a car? A waist because you can fit 2 more in the trunk.

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What did the deer say to the hunter? If you shoot me i'll die.

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who just made fun of katie matt

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Why was the mom sad cause she had an abortion

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What did a cat said to another cat? Nothing because cats dont talk.

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What did the dog say when his family's grandmother came back to life from the dead and ate everyone? Nothing. This is a highly improbable situation, and furthermore, dogs cannot speak.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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