What do you call a mix between a beaver and a mammal? You can't mix beavers and mammals, and even if I had said a platypus that would not have been funny.

I am black.

Why did Hitler go to the hospital? Because he shot and poisoned himself.

Why was the blond looking at the orange juice box? Because she was reading the nutritional content of orange juice.

Why was the boy sad? Because his dog was brutally murdered and the man responsible painted his bedroom walls in the dogs blood.

There once was a man from Peru who dreamed he was eating his shoe he woke with a fright, in the middle of the night and then went back to sleep

What do you call a retarded man? Nothing, because it's inappropriate to call retarded people names.

How do you make a chicken laugh. By showing it how to cross the road

What has two wings and a halo? A chinese phone. WING WING HALO?

Haha pizza

Fuck her

A white guy and a black guy are standing in a room. Which one of them is a murderer? I don't know, there is not enough information given in the question. However, according to Bureau of Justice murder statistics over the last 30 years, the black guy is 7.6 times more likely to be a murderer than a white guy in the United States.

How can you avoid being hit by a car? Don't get in the way.

womens rights

how do u unload the dishwasher? u take the dishes out!

A gay guy walks into a bar. Nothing is said to him, because homosexuality is accepted in this area.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot turned into a loaf of bread.

I man walks into a bar. He got drunk.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead...

Why was the Librarian mad at the laughing kids?? they were laughing cause someone shot her.

AROUND

Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber

why are these jokes so funny? why are u so fat bitch

What do you call cheese that's not yours? STOLEN! You're under arrest.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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