Excuses are like butt holes...they are round

What if Chuck Norris got shot by a bullet? The most interesting man in the world would save him.

Hitler

Chuck Norris walks into a bar, the bartender, a known drug smuggler for the Mexican Cartel fires three shotgun rounds. As the bartender reloads Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks first the shotgun out of the man's hands followed by three very quick blows to the head. The bartender goes down unconscious and he is arrested. Though the program is no longer produced, Walker Texas Ranger was a somewhat enjoyable, although poorly written and low budgeted made for television action crime drama series produced from April 21, 1993 to May 19, 2001.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Paris. Paris who? Paris, France.

a guy is driving home his wife calls him and she say's be careful there is a lunatic driving on the wrong side of the road towards traffic he then reply saying they all are

Why did the women cover up her vaginal area? She was with her friends, queefed, and was extremely self conscious.

There was an old woman who lived in a shoe. She had so many children her uterus fell out.

knock, knock no one answers man goes home and shots himself because he feels alone

Why did the black guy get arrested? Homicide.

Why was Six afraid of Seven? Six hasn't been the same since Vientnamn

Two jews walk into a bar. They laugh over a beer and leave

Why did the chicken cross the road Banana

How do you make a bowl of cheese? First you get a bowl. Then insert the cheese.

A man walked into the white house and security escorted him out because he didn't have a pass.

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Dying of terminal cancer.

What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing, rocks are inanimate objects, therefore rendering them unable to participate in the activity of speech.

your mamas so fat she falls out f both sides of the bed

What do you call Morgan Freeman on a bad day? Samuel L. Jackson.

whats slower then a turtle A FATTY

A black policeman and a white policeman work different shifts, one is during the day and one is at night and the both get equal pay.

im jewish

What did the jew get for christmas nothing because he doesnt celebrate christmas.

how do u unload the dishwasher? u take the dishes out!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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