a fat black man walks into an aquarium he enjoyed his day viewing many sea animals while buying a souvenier on his way out.

Dale a tu cuerpo alegria Macarena

Whats the difference between a horse and a pile of wheat? Its a pile of wheat.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

My friend said that onions are the only food that could make you cry. That was before I hit him with a watermelon.

Roses are red Violets are red Everything is red If you are dead... Or a potato

What do babies and caterpillars have in common? They're both dead. Except the caterpillar.

“Anything that moves ey?” – William Deane

Q: Whats better than ten babies in ten trash cans? A: One baby in ten trash cans

Why are there no more monkeys jumping on the bed? I shot them all.

When life gives you lemons. You make beef stew. #andymilinokis

How do you know when a Mexican has died? Well based on the large mass of people inside and outside the funeral home who mostly seem to be of a mexican background and cultue, it would be safe to say that those are his/her friends and family who care deeply about them and therefore you could conclude that a Mexican person probably passed away. It's actually quite sad and going to be a rough few days for those closely connected to the person who died.

A black man walks into a Subway restaurant, and goes up to the counter. The cashier already knows that he's going to order the chicken, but how does he know? Because the black man is a regular, and orders the same thing every time.

How many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back, and 50 in the ashtray.

What do you call a brunette between two blonds? Probably their friend. How should I know?

What is 6 plus 9? 15

What is long, erect, and 12 inches long? A ruler.

Dani Barton = Stupid

Do you think retarded people know that they are retarded? I don't know, you tell me. Wait a second....did you just call me retarded? They are clueless.

what do you call a cucumber that is wearing a dress.... an asian lady

What's the difference between medicine and astronomy ? They're different fields of studies.

why did susie get hit by the bus? cause the bus driver wanted her ice cream

Knock knock. Use the doorbell, dumbass.

how to you kill an Irish midget? You don't as murder is illegal and discriminating against a certain type of person is racist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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