Acouple of grammer nazis walk into a bar & 'their' treated very poorly.

how do you grow a choade? idk ask shea

why did Tommy fall of his bike? because he was getting raped by a walrus

21

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas? A visit from the Make a Wish Foundation and the opportunity to see her favorite band in concert. Unfortunately, she was very ill from the chemotherapy, and was unable to really enjoy herself at the concert. She passed away several days later, surrounded by family and friends.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side why didnt the chicken cross back? for the first time in his life, Clucky the chicken, felt liberated. his cruel life flashed before his eyes, forcing him to remember all the bad tines he had spent on the McKinley farm. all the eggs stolen from him, watching all his friends being taken for slaughter. it all came back. from the other side of the road, Clucky saw a place he never wanted to go back to, a place he wanted to forget. the day he chose not to cross back was the first real day in Clucky's life.

Humpty dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty dumpty had a big fall. All the king's horses and all the king's men did not come to help him because the United States does not have a patriarchal system of government.

whats the difference between a pizza and a jew -a pizza is food

Haha pizza

A guy walks into a bar. He order three drinks and hands them to the lady behind him. It's because she is an alcoholic.

What is the hardest part of a vegtable? The wheel chair 0.o

theres a fat guy

So I went to the airport the other day, and the new TSA regulations are very strict.

How did sally fall off the swings? she had no arms. Knock knock, who is there? Not sally.

What's worse than seeing your goldfish die? Watching your grandfather have a stroke.

why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, you tell me.

What do iPhones and Nokias have in common The nokia is indestructible. I lied about the iPhone

What did the boy get from Penn State University? A College Degree

What's the difference between roast soup and pea beef? Nothing because neither of them are physically possible; you can't roast soup and you can't pee beef

Freedom of Speech

what do you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientest? a mutant chicken

A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks him "why the long face?" the man replies with "I have AIDS."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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