What did the Scorpio say to the Aquarius? "How's Uranus? Ohhhhh!" The Aquarius replied: "I have maggots."

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The number one killer of daredevil's is the ground.

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i feel bad for black people (even though u can't consider them people)

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Two peanuts were walking down the street and one was asalted

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What did the convicted child molester say to the little girl? Nothing, they cut his tongue out in prison.

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What do you call a bad joke? Unfunny.

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Why couldn't santa eat cookies and milk at little Jimmy's house? He has diabetes and is unable to stray from a strict diet prescribed by his local doctor.

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yo mama's so fat, her medical weight chart is much steeper than those of most women her age

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Fish for a man, he has food for tonight. Teach a man how to fish and he will have one more skill under his belt.

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N e one else find the girl in the cellar from the new evil dead creepy ? Like shes some real demon being used by the movie industry to scare people? (serious qestion)

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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A little gir gets stung by a bee. Her parents see the bump She now geting meletedin Rehab because her parents saw her shoot up heroine.

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What smells worse than an old women's fart? the rotting carcus of a dead baby

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Why was the farmer buried in a grave on the top of a hill? He had died and this would be his final resting place.

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if life gives you lemons, make lemonade. unless you only get one lemon, then it really hard to make a good glass..and for that matter, who said you had a juicer? it would be really hard to just squeeze the juice out of a lemon. on top of that, what kind of situation am I in that I would need lemonade? let's say if life gives you lemons, determine the best use of them based on need, local weather and economic status

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Knock knock Who's there? The police your son died in a car wreck.

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Q: where did the pickle live? A: In the desert

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Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

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A horse walks in a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse didn't reply because he was a hoarse horse.

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Person 1: Do you like impressions? Person 2: Yes! P1: Why? ... P1: That was Socrates.

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Knock knock! Yes?

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What's big, black, wide, long, and has white lines all over it? A new highway road.

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Think of a number between -1 and 1 That's how many friends you have

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9/11 was a shocking time for all of us.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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