I have a joke Who is better, Kobe or Lebron? Kobe. But I lied, that wasn't a joke.

How do you scare Sarah Palin? You chase her around with a chainsaw while wearing a Jason mask.

whats the similarities between an xbox and michael jackson? there both made of plastic and they both get turned on by children

Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whroe whore whore whore whroe

Whats something really annoying? A guy who presses enter too much. hehe

Someone: I like my coffee like I like my men Someone else: Black? Someone: No, tied up, shoved in a burlap sack, and dragged through the mountains.

Person A - you must be tired, cuz you've been running though my mind all day Person B - i have no legs...

why did the elephant cross the road? it was the chickens day off.

Why did Jack like oranges? - Penis

What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

What did the Albino say to the other albino? Due to heredity and our inheritance of Chromosomes causing albinism, We could be displaced in society but luckily, we have eachother. They went home and lived happily. But not ever after. That craps or normal people. (freaking albinos...)

What do you call a black man with a knife and red liquid on his hands? A chef who accidently spilled strawberry jam on himself.

How do you find the population of Mexico? Send out a census

So theres a Black guy, White guy and Mexican guy all sitting at a bar. They were friends.

when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

Roses are brown I likes clouds This joke isn't funny so don't laugh

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

Why was little timmy crying? He walk in on his dad molesting a minor.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

Why doesn't a ducks quack echo? Actually, it does, but the echo is imperceptible to human ears.

What is stupid and looks like you? You.

This is an anti-joke.

A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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