What do you get when you cross a black man and an octopus? I don't know, but it sure would pick a lot of cotton.

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Why does Ray Charles always smile? Because he doesn't know he's black.

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what do you call a white man in a black neighborhood a minority

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Why did the bald man lose his hair no not cancer obviously AIDS.

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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Why didn't the man get into Harvard? Because he had bad grades

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What did the kid with turrets CHEESE! say to his mom.

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why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Half a worm... What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being Gang-raped!

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

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Person 1: want to hear a joke? person 2: yes.

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the bird.

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A neutron walks into a bar. The barman says, "for you, no charge." The neutron replies, "very funny asshole, you're just going to put it on my tab after I pass out."

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Q: what did the old man do to the little boy in his dark cellar while babysitting on a stormy night? A: told him to hold a flashlight because the power went out and he needed to find his electric generator.

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When did Dom become so brave? When he made friends

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Why did the german killed the jew? Because he was nazi.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because chad makes babies cry.

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Why did the girl throw away her hairspray? Because she realized the harmful contaminants emitted from the nozzle were expediting the deterioration of the ozone layer thus contributing to global warming.

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Q: why are black people so much darker than white people? A: genetics.

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A man walks into a bar. He has a nice drink and leaves.

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why did the baby die? It was hit by a bus and then raped by a seal.

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A man walked in to a store and asked for four candles. The storeman brought some fork handles and placed them on the counter. The customer said "No... 'Four Candles' a rather amusing sketch performed by The Two Ronnies, a comedy double act in the 1970s."

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why did the computer monitor stop working? Becasue it has a date with a slice of cheese.

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Why is a bird when it flies? Because the higher it goes the much.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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