Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

A woman walks in a confessional booth and proceeds to tell the priest about how she killed and ate her baby in a fit of hysteria because she is having issues dealing with her fresh divorce. The priest does not call 911.

What do you call someone who can legally murder? OJ Simpson

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

See you later... Just joke I'm blind

What's the difference between a bowling ball and guacamole? The guacamole is delicious with chips, and the bowling ball is just a bowling ball.

Why does everybody hates Justin Bieber? Just leave that girl alone!

how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

What's Rupert bear's middle name? the

what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

If my wife has got 6 oranges in one hand and 6 apples in the other hand, what has she got? No chance of stopping an uppercut.

What do you call a black man with a guitar? His name

Officer i'm dot nrunk, beriously you gotta selieve me!

What do you get when you cross a lion and a tiger? A Ligor.

Justing Bieber walks in a bar. Everyone shoots him.

Knock knock. Who's there? The bailiffs, we have come to take your house

what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Reading re-posts of classic anti jokes posted by lonely teenagers.

what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

SPILL THE BEAAAANNSSSS

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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