What do you call it when a black guy is talking to a white guy? A conversation.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing 'cause you done told the b i t c h twice!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

I dunno, I dont grade love, I want to see you, touch you, bang you (sorry for not having the guts to use a nicer word, but I am tired and that is what I have in me now) And while that makes me sound like some hippy, I am very fucking picky about who I spend time with, and when. And I got no male friends, waste of time, why spend time with guys when I can spend time with chicks. Excuse me, just need my meds, speaking of sincerity, yeah I use medications, wont tell you what, but its well, not for my "mental disorders" I was born crazy, and I am going to die like I live: INSANE.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the kid with no arms get for his birthday? A sock puppet.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

josh roberts makes nuns hang themselves

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did micheal Jackson get for Christmas?a restraining order!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

golf is so gay i mean look at what they name the different clubs 3 wood 4 wood 5 wood 6 wood just give it a beat and you got a catchy song

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot, racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

*Dubstep* CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW BWAB BWAB

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad your whole family isn't dead from a fatal car accident?

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Josh, this is your mother. I was wondering if you wanted me to bring my lube and strapon to bed tonight. Wait never mind about the strapon because i have my dick to use.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

what is the best part about sleeping with twenty six year olds? they are usually very experienced in sexual intercourse so there isn't much awkwardness

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

thumb_up thumb_down -30

what happens when u fall down the stairs? you break your arm.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

the moment right after you finish the last harry potter and remember the world wasn't saved and you still have cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -36

One night, a man dreams that he is a bird that can fly into outer space. The next day the man finds out that his son is a homosexual.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

what do you call a million black people on the moon? a good start

thumb_up thumb_down -42

What do you do when you have a baby and your being shot by a terrorist. You use the baby as a shield.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

A fake pizza delivery guy goes to a party and tries to deliver DiGornios pizza in another companys pizza box. The party host calls the police and the guy gets charged for stealing another companys uniform and impersonating a pizza palace worker. He had to return the uniform.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A blind man walks into a bar, bystanders help him up.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Q:What did the deaf kid say to the blind kid? A: nothing deaf kids can't talk they can only have conversations with their hands,which would be pretty useless at this moment cause the blind kid can't see his hand guestures

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops