I accidentally solicited a prostitute today. I was driving in an iffy neighborhood and saw a woman on the sidewalk, so I stopped to ask if she could give me directions. She must have misheard me.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why did bob eat the cookie? because he was hungry

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What happened to the pig? It got turned into bacon like every other pig.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a joke that isnt funny? This one.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the spoon say to the other spoon? Nothing, it is a spoon.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was really frogger in disguise

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Weaner

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why couldn't the kid eat his vegetables? His parents stabbed him...

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Fiona: SHREK! WHERE WERE YOU TONIGHT? Shrek: Out clubbing with the boys. Fiona: What did you do. Shrek: Eat Jews. Borat: iz vedy naaace

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why is your grandfather climbing up a pole? hes not

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats the difference between a monkey and a baby? Eating a baby tastes better with saltines.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why didn't the Mexican go to college? He was caught smuggling drugs over the border and was shot.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did a kid throw a clock out the window? Because he was adopted

thumb_up thumb_down -10

There was a girl that got on the bus . The bus started moving as soon as sat . The bus driver looked up at the window and saw the girl coming closer . Every time she came closer , the more he looked , the girls nose kept on bleeding more and more . When the girl was right next to the bus driver , he started to shudder in fear looking forward , knowing that she is there . When he looks to his right , the girl looked at him , then looked at the window . And started to pick her nose .

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why is Skrillex bad at fishing? Because he always increases the treble input in his songs, and he doesnt have a rod.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Hey you must be a parking ticket, because your yellow.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q. What's yellow and sour? A. Not a banana

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Hey guess what? What? You're a Tree.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I had a terrible childhood. My mom abandoned me before I was born.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops