Wanna hear the orphan joke knock knock who's there? not you parents

thumb_up thumb_down

Gerald: Hey did you know I was named AFTER Abraham Lincoln? Gloria: Because he was born in the 1800's and you were born and named many years afterward? Gerald: Ah... I guess I emphasized that joke a little to much - I'm sorry this conversation happened

thumb_up thumb_down

Dane Cook makes a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down

Cripples are lame.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

thumb_up thumb_down

How do get a cat to like you? Give it lots of love and attention

thumb_up thumb_down

Dont joke about the holocaust. My grandfather died there, he fell off the guard tower.

thumb_up thumb_down

A Mexican guy, a black guy, and an ISIS member walk into a bar. The black and Mexican men, realizing the potential danger in the situation quickly exit the bar and alert the proper authorities. $

thumb_up thumb_down

Why can a black man beat a white man in basketball? They are generally better at basketball Why cant a black man beat a KKK member in basketball? He valued his life and didnt want to die

thumb_up thumb_down

Why doesn't Jonathan Walk across the road? Because he is in a wheelchair...

thumb_up thumb_down

Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

thumb_up thumb_down

Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupter. Interrupter who? Interrupter Jones.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How many straight naked men can you fit in a wardrobe? I'm not sure but the situation is highly unlikely!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Can we still mine for gold in the American River? No, anyone seen mining for gold is considered a hobo and all the gold is cleared out by random people in the 17 century

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: What did the nazi say to hitler? A: You like my Auschwitz?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the woman come out of the kitchen? She didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars? No, we can't.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

An alcoholic walks into a bar.... I forgot the rest of the joke but your mother is a prostitute.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What happened when barba opened the coca cola? The cap flew off and hit the fence then the train then the moon then the pillow then the sun then the pole and the pole fell and hit the baseball and the cap landed on the floor... Then my turtle died

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My grandmother has degenerative brain disease, We may need to euthanise her.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What is funnier than Miley Cirus getting a Record Album? Justin Bieber's voice.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops