A: How can you tell a tree is an aspen? B: 'Cause of the way it is.

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My uncle told me that slow and steady wins the race. He died in a fire.

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Most adults can swim. Current government studies are investigating similar skills in babies. With unnecessarily large pools.

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Q: Were yyoouu talking smack about me? A: what? Q: did i studder? A:yeah you said yyoouu Q: well were ya A: no Q: oh ok.. A: k bye..

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A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

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What did the Insomniac, Dyslexic Priest do? He stayed up all night wondering if there really is a Dog.

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what has 2 legs and no eyes? A decapitated cat with only its lower half remaining

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Why was the man foolish for buying a new lamp? Because he lived in a small shack with no electricity and was probably going to die soon.

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Weaner

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Why do aliens listen to relaxing music while they have sex? They like to cum in peace. \m/

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civil rights

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Whats the definition of not winning? Charlie sheen losing custody of his son because he is a coked out, old man douche bag, who only gets told what he wants to hear because he forks out lots of money to gold digging hookers.

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What do you get if you cross a fairy cake with some boiled parsnips? Fladgemuffin

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Why did blonde drown? As a child a child she never learned to swim since she did not enjoy swimming.

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So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

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whats worse then a truck full of babies? if it went off a cliff into a canyon full of knives.

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Knock! Knock! Who's there? Russel. Russell who? Russell Johnson. Oh, come in.

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Well Here Goes Nothing And nothing happened

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NASA sent a probe to Uranus and wondered why people were laughing.

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

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Why did the police arrest the black man? He'd committed a crime, and was punished accordingly.

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So a dog walks into a bar.. well thats not true as most bars do not allow dogs.. oh..sorry.

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Why couldn't the girl go to the bathroom? Because she was obese.

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A frog walks up to Steve, and says "Hey, Steve." Steve is terrified because a frog knows his name, and is walking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops