Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

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What do you call a gay kid, a horrible singer, and has long hair for a guy? Justin Bieber

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My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

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How do you tell a crazy man that he is on fire? You're on fire.

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Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

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What do you call a guy who likes men? Gay

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Q: What do Captain Jack Sparrow, Captain Crunch, Captain Morgan and Captain Kangaroo all have in common? A: They are all caucasian

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(Something terribly disturbing that people find funny)

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What do Miley and Bill Ray Cyrus have in common? Half their DNA

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What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

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What happened when the Asian girl got a B on her report card? She committed suicide

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy, but heres my gamertag so party up maybe?

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Why doesn't Austin have sex? Because when his wife gets hot he puts dirt on her and hits her with a shovel

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why did andy wake up this morning. because he wasnt tired anymore

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why are black people always so funny because they think of funny jokes

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How do you make an egg laugh? That is an irrational question eggs are inanimate object and are unable to laugh

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A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

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i quit soccer because science happened and then i forgot how to screw in a lightbulb

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your moma is sao fat that she is gay . nope im sorry thats just mean.

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Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

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If God created the world, including man kind, why do we worship him? We are corrupt, selfcentered, animal slaughterers. He made us this. So, Why?

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An Australian man walking in Manhattan is approached by another man who pulls out a switchblade and says, "give me your wallet or I'll stab you with this knife!" The Australian man hands over his wallet. A nearby police officer witnesses this the last moment of the mugging, arrests the criminal and returns the Australian's belongings.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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