Did you hear about the guy who had his head chopped off? He's dead.

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What's the difference between a pile of rotting shit about to be re-heated in the microwave and Kevin James's new movie "The Zookeeper" ... Nothing.

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A jew walked into a bar Hitler said.... A jew walked out of a concentration camp

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Q:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A:Because it wa dead!!!!!!

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Q: Santa Clause, the Tooth Fairy, and a rich mexican jump out of the plane at the same time. Who hit the ground first? A: The answer is none of the above, because they don't exist.

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whats black and hangs from my tree my neighbor

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Your mom is so retard that she needs "special help" from medical professionals. :3 <33

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What do you call a jew without a nose? A most likely kind and interesting anti- steriotypical person

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A man travels to the park, and kills a person, throws them in a bag and runs away. He then travels to the grocery store, kills 2 people, throws them in a bag and walks away. He then travels to the gas station, kills 3 people and walks away. He keeps traveling around killing people until he has claimed 69 victims in all. From this, we can infer that he was a psychotic murderer with a perverted sense of humor.

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so a man walks into a bar...... He has a couple laughs over some drinks then went home.

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Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

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what is black and white and read all over? a bankrupt newspaper that cannot afford color ink because the accountant misplaced company funds.

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Knock knock. Whos there. Your landlord. Your landlord who? Bitch, i'm here with your eviction notice you haven't paid rent in weeks

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roses are red violets are blue sunflowers are yellow I bet you were expecting something romantic but this is just gardening facts

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what happened to those kids sandusky raped? who cares

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Q: Where does the queen of england live? A: This was the question I had to anwser to be able to post this joke.

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Why did the man have sex with other men? Because he was homosexual.

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What do you get when you stab a baby? A dead baby.

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What was Hellen Keller's favorite color? Velcro.

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people who spank you sure are a pain in the ass.

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Justin Bieber

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Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

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Knock knock Fuck off!

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Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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