Chuck Norris was dropped twice when he was a baby, once on concrete and once on hardwood

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What did the home-less man eat for dinner last night? Nothing.

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What has two legs but can't walk A paraplegic

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What is worse then your car getting hijacked? A 900 pound man eating a Donut.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy??? Just different pigmentation of their skin.

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Why did the guy run out of the whorehouse? Because when she spread her legs it looked like she was pulling apart a grilled ham and cheese sandwich.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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Roses are shut the f*** up. Violets are shut the f*** up. Shut the f*** up. Shut the f*** up.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a worm on the other side. And the more pressing question is why do i watch a chicken in my free time

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Roses are red Violets are blue We decapitated some little children Now I'm in jail too.

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What is long, hard, and full of seamen? a school bus, if you consider children to be seamen

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Why wouldn't Julius Caesar like olives on his pizza? Because he's dead.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Dad, why do people say mom is a nympho? No idea son, try asking one of your other dads.

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Brother: Where is my Guitar? Me: To the Left to The left Brother : No its not Me: Everything you own in the box to the to the left Brother : Im telling Mom Me: In the Closet Thats my stuff and if i bought please don't touch Brother: *Opens Closet* This is all Mine! Me: *Takes off headphones*? Huh? Brother: Nevermind - _ -

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One linners President Kinnedy did you like the parade President Lincon did you like the play

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Why was the little girl crying in the woods at night? There was psychotic killer chasing her with a chainsaw.

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why did the boy loose his job.... because he was only 14,dont know how he got it in the first place Chuckles

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Where do babies come from? You fathers penis.

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We was all sat down at the table ready to eat then Gary must've said something to Lucy because she just burst into tears and left the table.

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How do you drown a black? - pop their lips

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Did you fall from heaven? Because you look like Satan.

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what did the little boy get for christmas? nothing his parents stuck him in a mental ward to forget about him because he was mentally challenged.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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