What's the difference between my dog and my wife? I respect my dog.

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A black woman and a white woman are in a bar. They don't talk to each other though because they don't know each other. THE END.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says what will it be? The duck replies "lemonade!"

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What did the Blonde do when she saw train tracks? She walked over slowly, looked both ways, and crossed safely

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Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

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Why did the prestigious college accept the Native American student? Trick question, Native Americans don't exist anymore.

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My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

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What is green and slow Grass.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

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You know what he said? How did you know what he said?

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What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

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Q: Did you know Hellen Kellers father was a skilled craftsman? A: Neiter did she.

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Knock Knock! ... Whos there? ... Daisy ... Daisy who? ... Daisy me trolling... ;)

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Knock knock Who's there Joe Aids who's?

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What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

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What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the van

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Two penises walk into a minefield. Both are very careful with their every step and try not to be blown.

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Lukas: can i have a cigarette? Scott: i dont know can you? lukas: may i? Scott: NO

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What is the one thing you can never steal back? Your viginity.

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What did the kid with no arms get for his birthday? A sock puppet.

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What is the similarity between an elephant and a grape? Absolutely nothing. One is an animal, while the other is a fruit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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