My friend harris is fat.

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How many new born babies does it take to cover the wall? Depends on how hard you throw'em

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Two Muffins are in a freezer. The first muffin says "Sure is cold in here." The other muffin sits there untill at a later date eaten because muffins can't talk. The first muffin later is analyzed and dysected by the United States governmant and is classified as alien because again, muffins can't talk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try and beat the oncoming car.

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What do you call a fish with no "i's"? A blind fish.

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whats brown and sticky? a sweaty mexican

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Why did the man run over Suzy? He was a serial killer

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What do you call a shoe with no laces? Stilettos, sandals, flip flops, slippers, etc...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer left the gate open, letting all his livestock escape, and crushing his prospects of trying to keep his family fed.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I got pneumonia so now I am too

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Knock knock? Who is there? Nobody. Those were noises coming from your head.

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my mind's eye?

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You are like really sincere aren't you? I really appreciate that in a friend. Thank you for being who you are Nero.

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Roses are red.. Your child is also red.. I drove my car over his face. <3

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A kid goes into the ocean on a boogyboard and then gets eaten by a shark because the shark thought he was a seal.

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"What happened to John after he got drunk 12 years ago"- police "I don't really don't know that question"- John Jr.

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A Finn, a Swede and A Norwegian went to an island. The Norwegian shot them all.

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Why was a white man mowing his lawn ? The lawn was getting undesirably long which provoked the white man.

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Why did lil' Jenny fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What is the difference between Barack Obama and Mitt Romney? One is President, the other is not.

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3 friends are out camping. One says to the other "It sure is a great day to go fishing." The other says "Yes indeed." The third one says "I agree." After a few minutes of hiking, they go to lake and begin fishing.

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An English man, Irish man and a Scotsman walk into a bar. And have a wonderful evening of multicultural entertainment and fun together.

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Hi, how are you doing? Good how about yourself? Fine, thanks. Nice weather we're having Yeah, not too bad Have a nice day You too

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dylan hodge wishes he could suck his own **** jokes thats what his mothers for

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops