What's the difference between dead babies and the holocaust? A lot.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: What should you do when life gives you lemons? A: Life would never really give you lemons...

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Your dad must be a drug dealer because I saw him in your kitchen snorting cocaine

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I don't really like holocaust jokes because my grandpa was in it. Yeah he was drunk and fell off his guard tower.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A Texan, a Mexican, a Brit and a Frenchman are on a plane that begins having engine trouble. The black box was never found.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why couldn't the Jew get pregnant? Because he was man.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what did one computer say to the other .........

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Roses are red, Violets are red, Daisies are red, OH SHIT! MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Jay-z

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why is there a black president? Cause you voted for him. Thanks! Dick.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why was the chair spinning Cause it wants to

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A platypus walks into a bar. Why is there a butter knife in my basement?

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Why did suzy not eat her breakfast? because i stapled her to the table.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the black guy get a boner? The nitric oxide levels in his trabecular arteries and smooth muscle of his penis rose, causing his arteries to dilate and therefore enlarging his penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

if yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too. Cna yuo raed tihs?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the boy drop his peanuts and crackerjacks? He had a sudden heart attack and died at the age of 10

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what do you call a black man sleeping on a park bench at 2 in the morning? Homeless

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's big and white and wilbkill you if it falls from a tree? My dick.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops