How do you confuse a bar tender? You ask him how tender he is.

Why did the boy fall off the swing?

josh moran where your Bluetooth gone?

Mother Theresa, Billy Graham, and Joseph Smith walk into a bar. Just kidding, no they didn't.

Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

Why didn't Jimmy do well at school? Because he was recently in a car accident, which severely damaged his brain, making it difficult for him to learn things, because of his severely damaged brain, which he got in a car accident, which he was recently involved in.

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

Knock Knock! Who's there? Dog Dog wh- wait how did you knock? *mindblown*

why are some people black? Because god decided there needs to be different people in the world therefore none are congruent

Denard Robinson

Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

A blond is on her way driving to the airport when she sees the sign "Airport left." She made a left turn and got to her flight on time.

My wife asked me to prepare our son for his first day of school. He's a ginger so I punched him in the face, and stole his lunch money.

Why did the black man cross the road? He was going to meet up with his friend who happened to be Irish.

Why was the emo kid sad? Because he gets raped by his dad every night

Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

How to make deep fried chicken. Step 1: Go to your local swimming pool. Step 2: Throw a dead chicken into the deep end. Step 3: Strike the chicken with lightning. Step 4: Remove your newly fried chicken. Enjoy!

A jumpercable walks in the bar the bartender says ill get you something but dont start anything.

WHAT DOES A NUMBER DO WHEN IT'S HORNE? MATHDERBATION

How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

Yo mama is so fat that her doctor advised her to get some exercise or risk developing a heart condition!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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