Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

whats small and blue? a suffocated baby

Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

You know what pansies remind me of? What? A flower

Why is six afraid of seven? SE7EN!

Why do white people not eat crackers? Cause it's cannabalism.

How many apes does it take to put in a light bulb 3

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar

Roses are red, my binoculars are blue. When your window's open, i'm watching you.

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint

Why did the middle-aged lady have a heart attack? Years of heavy smoking, alcohol abuse and lack of exercise had taken its toll on her body, causing it to age prematurely. @JWest

how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

How many women can fit on a bus? It depends on the size of the bus.

A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar and the bartender says: "Where would you like to sit, gentlemen"?

How do you kill a domb blond? Shoot her in the head.

what do you call a mexican with a rubber blanket cold

KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

Why did the farmer cross the road? To catch the chicken

What happens when an alien goes out in the rain It gets wet

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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