Some say Helen Keller can't write a good book. You know what she said? Nothing.

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Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? Because it was sold out

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An alligator crawled into a bar Animal control is promptly called and he is released in a nearby lake

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A father and his son get into an accident and are whisked away to the hospital. The father dies, and the son is brought into surgery. The doctor is rushed in, but looks at the boy and says "I can operate on this boy, his my son." How is this possible? The boy's father was a zombie.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was persecuted for his faith.

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A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

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A Johnson walks into a hole. Why am I in this hole? Because rape is not an option.

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What do u call 30000 Mexicans rolling Dow a hill. Hahaha your mom

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Lol! The connection timed out. Double D`s they kill my back so I am gonna get them reduced someday, and sure because it gets really itchy otherwise.

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What did the deaf blonde say to the brunette? Nothing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his village has been ravaged by small pox.

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roses are red violets are blue get out of my face before i kill you

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What do you call a cow with no legs. Dead, the farmer cut them off.

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A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer walk into a bar. They order some drinks, sit quietly and stare at their shoes until they've finished their drinks, then go back home and wallow in loneliness, wishing their social skills weren't so abysmal.

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Q: What race was Jesus Christ? A: None, he's not real

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to prove he wasn't chicken

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why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

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whats gay and american? a gay american

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A man on his 21st birthday walks into a bar. He orders a piña colada. The bartender then replies "Sorry we do not sell piña coladas here." In disappointment, the man decides to order a different alcoholic drink and later becomes an alchoic for 20 years until he breaks his obsession and remarries his wife and has 5 kids. He then had a great life and died at age 92. He will be missed by his wife and children.

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what did the bus driver say to the black man when he got on the bus? nothing, carl has become very anti-social since his brother died

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How do you call the uncle who molested you as a child? More than likely with a telephone.

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a cat gets mauled by a dog. it died later that day

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I just sharpened this hatchet Don't make me use it!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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