What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

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What's worse than sex with a midget? Non-consensual sex with a midget.

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My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

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Why was the fat man crying? He was sentenced to the electric chair for a murder he didn't commit.

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Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

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In Soviet Russia, this type of joke would be considered evidence to throw you into the gulag.

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why did the baby fall down the steps? Because there was big earth quake that blocked his parents on the other side of the house, therefor leaving no one capable of getting to him befor falling

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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What do you call a blonde at the beach? A dipthong.

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Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

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Anti Jokes = Drained

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What do you call an armless legless man swimming? Dead

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If Alex Maitland reads this he is gay

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the person who wrote 1 under me is gay

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Guess what what?? chicken butt!!!!!

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roses are red violets are blue I lost my dog to typhoid it was an unfortunate case of bed luck

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Why doesn't Billy like his new step-dad? He's secretly a murderer and only Billy knows, he wants to tell the police but hes afraid to.

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Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? Three bee stings. Whats worse than three bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Four bee stings.

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What do you call a gay kid, a horrible singer, and has long hair for a guy? Justin Bieber

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Why did the plane crash? Because a loaf of bread was the pilot.

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whats white and sticky? a white stick

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Whats 9 plus 10? 19

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What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Nothing. She isn't supposed to chat because it's study hall and they enforce a strict "no talking" policy.

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Teacher- Pick the odd one out- Man, whale, bat, squirrel, frog Student- Whale. All others are found in Nebraska

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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