Why did the accountant die?A terrorist put a bomb under his desk.

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Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? I don't know.

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What's worse than finding The Holocaust in your apple? Most things, because that's impossible.

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A man walks into a bar, orders a drink, drinks it, and leaves.

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What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

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What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man i a gorilla suit with a banana.

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Drunk, a tweeker and a pot head are walking together when they come upon a huge wall with a large, locked gate in the middle of it. The drunk shouts "lesh shmash it down!" then passes out. The tweeker says "Dude, we should totally take the lock apart and see if there's some kind of mechanism in there holding it together that we can use to build some sort of machine for taking... oh man I gotta crap so bad! Either of you guys gota smoke?" and the pot head says "We should sit here and wait." I didn't say it was a good story

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i thought violets were violet. hmph.

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What's better than wining the para Olympics? Wining the Olympics.

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Q: What happens if you pee on a rock and scraches it on a tree? A: The tree gets wet

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Rose: Mom, why was I named Rose? Mom: Because when you were born a rose petal landed on your head. Rose: Than why is my brother named Brick? Mom: I liked the name.

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What did the black man say tovtye chinese man? Hello sir how are you today?

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A blond, brunette, and a red head are stranded on an island. They find a genie, who tells them each one can have one wish. They all wish for the same thing, to be back home with their families.

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A neutron walks into a bar. The barman says, "for you, no charge." The neutron replies, "very funny asshole, you're just going to put it on my tab after I pass out."

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Whats black and flys out of a car? Pupies stuffed in a bag.

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Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

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what did the philosopher say, when he considered the transient nature of life in relation to ones own personal and egocentric grasp upon circumstance and purpose? massive erection.

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How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? No seriously, I don't know because we've only just got electricity in our village.

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whats long hard and full of seamen? a submarine.

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what did the penguin use as a napkin? a napkin

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Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

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What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow

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A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

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How many drugs does it take for Eminem to sing in a live concert? Enough.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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