why did the guy laugh at everything he was high

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Carrot fingers

thumb_up thumb_down -10

For Chuck Norris every street is one way his way.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are red, violets are blue, twilight is gay and Justi Bieber too.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the pedophile say to the delightfully curly-headed youth? If I can't have you, I'm going to shoot you through the nails with a nail gun.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's the difference between an apple and a baby. An apple is a fruit. A baby is a human being.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How did the fireman get the cat out the tree? He sprayed it with a hose, killing it in the process.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard. I guess I make a good milkshake.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Womens rights

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what's wrong on so many levels? wrong wrong wrong wrong

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q. How do you kill 5000 flies? A. Slap a afraican in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's 9+10? 19

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why is an elephant big, gray and lumpy? Because if it was small, white and smooth it would be an Asprin.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what do you call a clown in makeup? a clown, clowns are supposed to wear makeup.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What Happens if a Muslim boy gives you a bomb? You give it to someone else as your playing tnt tag and the bombs a toy

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you put 100 kids on a girls face ? skeet

thumb_up thumb_down -12

The child was fired from his job.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Sidney Crosby walks into a bar. Except its a metal bar like a pole so he gets another concussion.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why did tom shut his bedroom door? grandma was fingering herself

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's up? Up Adverb: Toward the sky or a higher position. Preposition: From a lower to a higher point on (something); upward along: "I climbed up a flight of steps". Adjective: Directed or moving toward a higher place or position: "the up escalator". Noun: A period of good fortune. Verb: Do something abruptly or boldly: "she upped and left him". Synonyms: adverb. upward - upwards - aloft - above - upstairs - overhead preposition. on - upon - over - along - with adjective. rising noun. ascent - rise - upgrade verb. raise - enhance - increase - lift - rise

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why doesn't Stephen Hawking play football? Because he's a nerd.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why doesnt the chicken wear any pants? His pecker is on his head

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q. How much Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? A. None, they just steal one.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops