whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

Q: Whats the difference between a trash can full of dead babies, and a porch? A: A porch isnt in my garage.

Jack be nimble. Jack be quick. But Jack still couldn't out run that bullet.

42

What's long, dark, and smelly? The unemployment line.

Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday

Teacher: Why did you fail this test? Student: Because the hamster that gives energy to my brain just died.

what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

what do u call a black guys dick a pogo stick

1-"What's the worst thing about a joke?" 2-"The stupid punchlines at the end" 1-"No-- when someone dies and can't live to tell it..." (laughter) 3-"What joke you guys laughing at." 2-"None of you're business" 3-"Damn I really wanted to know" 1-"Didn't we all."

Haikus are good poems, They don't always make sense though, I saw a squirrel.

Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

Recycled jokes are about as good as a scalar roundabout... [L]

What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

When is a door not a door? When it is thrown away. Then, it will likely decompose in a landfill or be recycled into another product. In either case, it will no longer be a door.

Do you like fish sticks? Yes. Me too.

What is the first letter of the alphabet? A. a B. 7 C. Mustard gas D. Because a penguin has 2 legs

A dyslexic man walks into a bra drinks a bear and leafs .....

Why was the man arrested? He assaulted and raped an elderly woman at the local Walmart. He then proceeded to hijack the poor woman's Scooter and lead police on a 4 mile long car chase.

Little Johnny was walking through the park... only he had no legs. Little Johnny was raped later that day... while he bled out from him having his legs cut.

What's the difference between a red shirt and a blue shirt? one is red and one is blue

Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? He tried to cross the road.

what is the meaning of life? i dont know, but im fairly sure its not 42

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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