Why did the 80 year old man lose his vision? Because he recently blew his head off.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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what has 2 legs and no eyes? A decapitated cat with only its lower half remaining

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A blonde walks into a bar. She got free drinks.

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How did the guy feel after his wife died? Pretty shitty, I'd imagine..

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What do you call a cat that gets pushed into the pool? Angry as hell.

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Q how do you feel? A with a series of nerve endings, that send signals to my brain

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The funniest thing about this joke is that by the time you realise it doesn't say anything its to late to stop reading it

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whats the difference between a black man and a cat? you dont run from a cat

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What did the flag say to the pole? It dosnt

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A black man is seen next to a dead man. Who do you call? The ambulance.

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An American, an English and a Scottish got in the bar and ordered the same drink. After that they left.

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why do they sparkle?!?!?!?!

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side.

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How big does your mouth have to be to eat a baby? How would i know, i'm not a canible.

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What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

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If I am from Texas, where are you from? You know the answer? HOLY SH*T! YOU ARE A GENIUS!

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What does a ghost get when he watches porn? A boner

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Hey I've got two stories. This one and the next one.

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Why did the boys shout ZACHATTACK? Because zach was attacking

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How to confuse a dumbass: see next post.

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Person1: Man I had the worst day ever. Person2: Worser than the holocaust.

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Three Jewish men walk into a butcher. They dont buy any pork products and thank the butcher for his services.

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How do u turn on a lamp? Flip the switch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops