What's green, has six legs and lives in the jungle? A Snooker Table.

what do you do when you see a black man punching a girl? act like you dont see it and get the hell out of harms way

whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whroe whore whore whore whroe

Q: why did the dog fall down the stairs? A: Because I pushed him down.

What is the sun's favorite day of the week? The sun is a mass of incadescent gas and cannot feel emotions; therefore, it cannot have a favorite day of the week.

whats big and green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a snooker table

Bird is the Word. Actually 'What" is the word.

The teacher asked: If you have two apples, and I give you two, how many do you have now? FOUR said the student.

What did the asian kid do before he got a blood test? He studied.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

FIONN'S ECONOMICS GRADE

why did andy wake up this morning. because he wasnt tired anymore

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

What do you get when you cross two things that are seemingly unrelated? A play on words.

Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

What color is Michael Jackson? Pale because he's dead.

Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

Q: What was the pirate movie rated? A: PG-13 actually because, despite the potentially graphic nature of the previews, the creators scaled down mature content so that it could reach a wider audience.

Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

Knock Knock Fuck off. I am new here. I do not know anyone here.

Q:Wanna know a funny joke? A:Womens Rights

There is a Asian a black guy and a white guy the black guy loves apples the white guy loves pears and the Asian loves Macaroni the white guy gets a apple the black guy gets a pear and the Asian has no lunch so the black guy kills the white guy for the apple and the Asian kills the black guy because he is hungry

Why did the car stop working. The owner was unable to pay the outrageous price for gasoline and was forced to ride a bicycle to and fromvwork every day. Over the course of several months without being run, the engine seized and was forever broken.

How many babies does it take to cover a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...