Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

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What did the penis say to the condom? Cover me i'm going in.

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Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

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How did the chicken cross the road? Assuming the vehicles yielded to the chicken, it looked both directions before crossing then proceded across the street while staying between the crosswalk lines until it had reached the other side of the road.

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Why did the old man cross the road? Coz he was in an ambulance

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Why does tundes food suck? Because he is from Africa and the cuisine is different

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Whats worse tan finding a worm in your apple? Being touched by Michael Jackson

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How come Dorothy couldn't feel her legs? The metal cable snapped.

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guess what? i dont know, what? i dont know either, i thought you knew.

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ms caissie is secretly laughing at these...

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A duck walks into a bar, clearly ignoring the 'No Ducks Allowed' sign that had been placed in the window to prevent comedic scenarios.

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what's the difference between a pound of liver and vomit? £3.24

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck could chuck as much wood as a wood chuck would if a wood chuck could chuck wood.

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A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

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What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Santa stops after 3 hos

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

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Great ideas: Go to your facebook account and type in: Man, I am gonna suicide right now, bye! Moral: Now if you do it as well, nah, dont do it, seriously... Just type it!

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what do chinese kids make for fathers day? shoes

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the lesbian's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

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What did the rabbit say to the man nothing animals cant talk

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Knock knock Fuck off!

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There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

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Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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