"Ask me if I'm a tea pot" "Are you a tea pot?" "No" Try this on your friends

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because black people are usually stronger than chicken. If they weren't, chickens would probably eat fried black people.

Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should I know? I'm not a chicken :/

Why did Tommy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Tommy.

Refridgerator.

A man walks in to a bar, and the Bartender says "Why the long face?" The man replies "My wife is dying of Terminal Cancer".

Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

How many pancakes can you fit into a gopher hole? Red - because ice cream doesn't have any bones.

When the going gets tough... Commit suicide.

What did the cow say to the Businessman? Nothing. Cows cant talk.

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

What's brown and smells like paint? -Poop. I don't know why it smells like paint though..

Why didn't the man give a location of the murderer? He was murdered

A man rode into town on Friday and came out on Friday how did he manage this? He stayed for a couple of hours

Thats so awesome, I was totally not not going to tell you and when I saw I did not not type it I totally did it anyways, but why did it last even though stuff timed out? I am like so wet.

yo momma!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

What do you call a plane going to Africa with 100 black people on it? A plane, the contents of the plane is irrelevant...

what do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? run

Yo mama's so fat, she died of a mixture of obesity and type 1 diabetes.

Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

a dyslexic man walks into a bra and realizes he is quite lucky as another man walks into a large steel pole

Ask me if I'm a car. Are you a car¿ Yes¡

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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