What do tigers dream of when they take a tiger snooze? Mike Tyson

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why didn't the boy go to the bathroom? His mother was taking a well deserved bath.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I had a chocolate chip cookie today, thats it, just a chocolate chip cookie.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Spongebob. "Hey Patrick, I thought of something funnier than 24." Patrick "Let me hear it." Spongebob "25"

thumb_up thumb_down -11

An man was tested positive for HIV. He then called his girlfriend and told her she should get tested.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down -11

hey girl, My Gyarados is BIG enough for you to ride it ALL day and night

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's long, black, and the tip is shaped like a mushroom? A mushroom.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Bala: Brid why don't you drink? Brid: When I was in college I was in students council. Whenever my friends called me during night, I used to go pick them up. Once we were working late in college and in the morning my hair was all ruined...

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what's funnier than AIDS on a holocaust boy? everything. AIDS and the Holocaust are two terrible things.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A Texan, a Mexican, a Brit and a Frenchman are on a plane that begins having engine trouble. The black box was never found.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

In the movie Dark Skies, little white boys were haunted by a mysterious force. The answer is obvious, isn't it? They are being haunted by Michael Jackson's ghost.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's green and has wheels? Your mom.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do I hate? people

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza is an Italian food and a jew is a human that practices the Jewish faith

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why didn't suzzana go to school on Monday?? Because it was Sunday...I lied about it being monday

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: What did one water bottle say to another water bottle? A: Nothing. Water bottles are inanimate objects and are thus unable to communicate.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Where did the kid go when the bomb exploded? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down -11

why was the little boy crying? He had dead mice shoved up his asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How do you knock up a Catholic girl? Put your penis into her vagina without wearing a condom.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did Hitler kill himslef? He saw his gas bills.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

One afternoon, a man walks into a bar, looking sad and purchases a large drink. "Bad day?" the bartender asks, "I just found out my youngest son is gay." the man replies. "Wow that's bad buddy, I'll buy you the drink, on the house." Two weeks later, the same man walks into a bar, looking sad and purchases a large drink. "Bad day?" the bartender asks, "I just found out my second son is gay." the man replies. "Wow that's bad buddy, I'll buy you the drink, on the house." Two weeks later, the same man walks into a bar, looking sad and purchases a large drink. "Bad day?" the bartender asks, "I just found out my oldest son is gay." the man replies. "Doesn't anyone in your family like women?." the bartender asks. The man thinks about it. "Yeah, my wife."

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A gay man kisses a gay man and therefore is considered gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops