A man walks into a bar. Three hours later, ambulances arrived, because the man was knocked out. The man who saved was known as a hero, and was awarded a medal for his good deed.

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How do my feet smell? Oh wait. They can't. Feet are not sentient independent beings and therefore cannot experience the five senses, including smell.

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What is green and smells like paint? Grass, it doesnt smell like paint, I lied.

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Whats better than 32 dead babies stapled to 1 tree? - 1 dead baby stapled to 32 trees

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Why did dallin fall off the swing he got hit by jds big penis

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- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What? Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

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what did the guy say when he lost his sandwich? wheres my sandwich?

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HAHAH MY WORD IS HAPPY CLAPPY

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What do you call a guy with a puppy, candy, and a windowless white van? You're next baby sitter.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist bastard.

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Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

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69.

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How did little Sally break her Nintendo DS? Her abusive father repeatedly abused her and punished her until she was thrown into a stone wall. As she went into the wall she crushed by another wall and broke the DS.

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What does a grandmas vagina taste like? I don't know -- nor do I want to.

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Your mamma so fat she bungie jumped straight to hell

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put C where A is. :D

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A dog with toothpaste in it's mouth wanders into a bar. The bartender beats it to death, because he thought it had rabies.

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Did you hear about the circus fire? Yes, apparently there were no casualties but all their props and equipment were destroyed, which will set the company back financially, even with the insurance.

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How does Hitler tie his shoes? with little Nazis!

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Why would you kill a black man? Well, murderers have different motives, the most common of these are revenge or a psychological illness.

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What musical band do you get if you keep shouting while in the mountain? The rolling stones. What do you get if you keep shouting in a snow covered mountain top? Blizzard Entertainment.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by a fridge.

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Whats hard and long and used to penetrate women? A hypodermic needle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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