When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

Roses are red,violets are blue, i love the colour red and green but its a pitty because im not so keen.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice t*ts

Why did the Squirrel swim across the river upside down? To keep its nuts dry.

Roses are yellow, Violets are purple, im not color blind you just cant read.

A musician without any music walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Who do you think you are, a hobbit?" The musician without any music says,"yeah" and turns into a hobbit

Why does the black man take drugs. Because he is very sick.

An orange walks into a bar....orange you glad I didn't say banana?!?!

If a large bear falls out of a tree, why would a giraffe also eat the cheese?

In America you read books, but in Soviet Russia, it's exactly the same as it is in America, because it's not possible for books to read humans.

I took my blind grandmother to the art gallary

9/11 my birthday

What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot.. You racist bastard.

2 black guys, a colombian guy and a white girl are sitting at a bar. They are friends.

quiz is to quizzicle as test is to test___.

"what did the priest say to the rabbi?" "what" "my religions better

a black guy walks into a bar and sits next to a white guy. White guy: "I don't like your kind here". Black guy: "what kind wound that be"? White guy: "the colored kind". The black guy turns away then looks back at the white guy and says", When I'm born I'm black, when I die I'm black, When I'm cold I'm black, and when I'm sick I'm black. You ( to the white guy ) when your born your pink, when you die your blue, when your cold your purple, and when your sick your green and your calling me colored???

Think of a number 1-10 Now add 39 Divide that by 20 Subtract two Now close your eyes.. Dark isn't it?

Why can't Helen Keller just kidding she's dead

Dont joke about the holocaust. My grandfather died there, he fell off the guard tower.

Q: What do you call a black man with no arms and no legs? A: Whatever his first name is.

What do you call a Welshman with a stick up his arse? A very odd man

why were the niggas in paris? rhetorical question. everyone knows they aren't french

What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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