Q:Why did the dwarf shout abuse at the bus driver? A: He had anger issues, and the price of the ticket was quite unreasonable.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

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Which is worse, 9/11 or the holocaust? Biting into an apple and finding a worm.

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q. why did the guy forget what he did at the paty last night? a. because he had short term memory loss

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Q:What happened after the snake tricked Adam and Eve into eating fruit from the tree of wisdom? A: Nothing, but the three of knowledge was a whole other story though. Moral Man.

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Two blondes walks into a tavern, which is kind of funny, since the second one should have seen it.

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Why was little timmy crying? He walk in on his dad molesting a minor.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

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that awkward moment when there is no candy in the van.....

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Why didn't Avery die when he got hit by a bus? The bus was going three miles per hour.

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How do you find the population of Mexico? Send out a census

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Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

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Q: Why is asprin white? A: It works.

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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An over weight naked black guy walks into a bank and says "give me all your money!"

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What did the coat say to the dog? Nothing, the coat was inanimate

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Me: What postion in baseball does a cat play? You: I don't know? What? Me: I don't know i haven't eaten that part yet.

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While getting Sherrie's Crabcakes I was arrested by Missy Hepp highway patrol.

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HAHAHAHAHAHA.....shut up your joke isn't better.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A= Were both lawyers! What happens every sixty seconds in the us? A= a minute passes!

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the fridge door and place the elephant inside. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the fridge door, remove the elephant, and place the giraffe inside. There is a party at the zoo. All of the zoo animals attend, except one. Which one? The giraffe, because he is in the fridge.

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If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, what does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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