Tim and Jim are Telling Jokes Tim: Knock Knock ... Jim does not respond because Tim has a mental disorder causing him to believe in hypothetical doors and thus ignores him so that he does not upset his friend

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

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What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree and onto your head, it will kill you? A pool table.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a muslim cleric walk into a bar. In Syria. Dead children.

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What would it take to reunite the Beatles? Two more bullets.

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How many fingers am i holding up? none, my hand got blown off in Vietnam

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What is a pirate's favorite movie? A pirated movie.

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How do Chinese people name their kids? They could look up a baby-names book, consult their family history, or make one up

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What's louder than a cat stuck in a tree? A foghorn.

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You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

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What did Sally get for chirstmas? Cancer

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An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

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Why is Joel always with Jamie? Because her incorrectly positioned eyes prevent her from seeing the true Joel.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

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what do you get when you cross a daniel lesiak with nothing?

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What do u call a ginger man with no ears? What ever the hell u want Because he's deaf

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What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already taken her police statement and she doesn't want to discuss the incidentit anymore until her lawyer arrives.

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Did you hear about the new brand of shovel? Yeah, it's pretty groundbreaking.

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Knock knock. Who's there? the police.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares...he didn't make it anyways..

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whats hairy and crys your mom

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Why did the christmas tree smell like shit? because pavaroti used it as a dildo

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A apple a day keeps gramar away.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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