A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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Doctor doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

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Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Q: Whats white and fluffy? A: White fluff

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

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Your mom.

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What's black and has ne education? A tire.

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Chuck Norris was in a staring contest with the sun. He's blind now.

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

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i'm hard

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If you had 4 oranges in one hand and 7 oranges in the other, what would you have? Really big hands.

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how do you make lady gaga cry you poke here face then rape here.

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What happened when Johnny fell off of his bike? He suffered a very tragic and fatal brain hemorrhage resulting in a lower population by a minute percentile that is undetectable by the US Census.

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Three friends were walking to school, they all looked in front of them and ran away. What did they see? A 200 ft dragon eating their school.

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A cat walks into a bar. He orders some beer. The bartender asks, why the sad face. The cat replies, "I got laid off"

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Why did the dog die? He was old

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How do you take a picture of a man with a wooden leg? You can't take pictures with wooden legs.

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There was a kid and one day he didnt do his homework...he failed.

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How did Whitney huston die? By eating a turkey sasandwich and then put a car jump starter in the bath tub.

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Who's a tool and a NARC? Josh Brami!

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3 men of different races walk into a bar. The bartender then proceeds to ask, "what would you 3 men like?"

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Roses are red,violets are blue,hit me once I will break you to Roses are red,violets are blue,I will kick your ass, as hard as to

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Why did the black man go to the store with a gun? He recently bought it a couple days before to go hunting, but it wasn't working correctly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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