what do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? a stick

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His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

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Try this on some random person on the street... You: "Excuse me sir, do you know how to get to Farnsworth Street?" Man: "Sorry, no" You: "OK, you go straight ahead, then turn left on the second street. Continue about 200 feet, then......"

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your mom.

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Why couldn't the little seven year old girl paint her finger nails? She fell in front of a train.

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What did the autistic man say to the woman? I have autism

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How do you get a black person out of a tree? Tell them to come down

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Why did the black man eat lucky charms? Because it was breakfast time and he was hungry.

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My mom farted, now it smells, ewe. My mom just took of her shirt, BONER! My, friends mom took off her shirt, now he has a boner. We both have boners, and it smells bad. This is weird, me and my friend are very similar, except my mom farted and his mom did not. Now I hate my mom. UN-BONER!

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what's the difference between a black man and a tricycle well the black man's a human

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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I dont think i could ever stab someone, I can barely get a straw through a capri sun

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Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent gets brutally murdered.

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Why does the rabbit go in the hole? because that's where it lives.

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How did the chicken cross the road?he just got up and walked to the other side.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Three explorers are walking through the jungle when they are suddenly captured by a group of cannibals, the cannibals, going through years of culture and hereditary custom, kill the explorers, skin their bodies, chop them to pieces and cook their flesh, finally they eat it giving them a prosperous feast while the rest of the world is unaware of whatever happened in that jungle.

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Q: How do you make an onion cry? A: You can't, it's an onion.

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My daughter got a kinder surprise with cool toy today..... i killed her i didnt even want the toy

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What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

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a fat man walks out of mcdonalds

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Q: What's purple and eats desks. A: My dog.

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I have a horse.

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What begins with "B" and ends with "N" that you never want to call your neighbor? a Black Person

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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