Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change the bulb, one to suck my dick!

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One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

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A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

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Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

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No smoking No eating No drinking On this bus Didn't say anything about sniffing

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A black woman and a white woman are in a bar. They don't talk to each other though because they don't know each other. THE END.

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whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whroe whore whore whore whroe

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Are you ready kids "Aye Aye Captain" I Can't hear you "AYE AYE CAPTAIN" Ohh... Who lives in a pineapple under the sea "Spongebob squarepants" Absorbant and yellow and porous is he "Spongebob Squarepants" If nautical nonsense be something you wish "Spongebob Squarepants" Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish "Spongebob Squarepants" READY Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

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What's black, white, and red all over?? A penguin that just got hit by a truck and is now struggling to live.

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What's Worse Than Falling Over? .......Rape.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a socially responsible chicken and his family was on the other side and every day walks his ass across the street to go to work to provide for his family, unlike your dead-beat ass.

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What did the black boy wear for Halloween? A costume.

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Bird is the Word. Actually 'What" is the word.

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Why did the prestigious college accept the Native American student? Trick question, Native Americans don't exist anymore.

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How old are you? 7

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Teacher- Pick the odd one out- Man, whale, bat, squirrel, frog Student- Whale. All others are found in Nebraska

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the elephant asks the man, " how do u breathe out of that thing?" the man proceeds to explain to the elephant how he breathes out of his nose.

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Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

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Why did the virgin masturbate until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well why wouldn't it?

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Q: What was the pirate movie rated? A: PG-13 actually because, despite the potentially graphic nature of the previews, the creators scaled down mature content so that it could reach a wider audience.

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Hay is for horses and other hay consuming mammals.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops