Alright so an elite group of Navy Seals walk into a mansion. They open fire on Osama Bin Laden and kill him.

knock knock... whos there? NOT BIN LADEN!

Who threw beer on livvy barnett? Cam irwin.

Thank you, you remind me that I am not insane, just because I believe we humans can accomplish more, by uniting as one, rather than fighting one another. I feel as if I belong somewhere else, yet the question remains always, are people such as you better, or are we relics from the past?

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah Witness

Why did the black man offer the girl flowers? It was his niece's birthday.

Knock knock. Who's there? We are members of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints.

What's tiny and smells like a big banana? A tiny banana

Noses are red, Lips are blue, I have hypothermia, So do you.

Why was the little boy crying? Because there was a hair in his burrito

A traveling salesman stops at a farmer's house. The farmer then offers the salesman a bed with his daughter. The salesman quickly replied, "I don't want to go to bed right now. I need to know the way to Pawtucket." The farmer then gave the salesman directions and the two parted ways.

Knock knock. Who's there? Blanket Blanket who? Blanket, son of deceased recording artist Michael Jackson. Ever since his father died there has been so much stress in the family that he could not handle it. He ran away and is now seeking shelter and grief council.

Hello. my name is Rhys. and i'm the only person who liked this post.

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Your mother is so obese that she has over the recommended daily calorie intake on a regular basis.

some weirdo nerd was just convicted of a hit and run Just kidding. All he did was suffocate your dad with a whoopee cusion.

Potatoes have skin, i have skin, so therefore i must be a pig

An asian walks into class to take a math test. He did not study and consistently misbehaves and promptly fails.

Why is a bird when it flies? Because the higher it goes the much.

Q:What happened after the snake tricked Adam and Eve into eating fruit from the tree of wisdom? A: Nothing, but the three of knowledge was a whole other story though. Moral Man.

What is red and fluffy?... Your teddy bear covered in blood...

What's worse than celery stuck between your teeth? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

I'm a wise old man, so I'm aloud to touch you in the bathing suit area.

Why did the cat scratch the person? Because it's mean.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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