if you fall, I'll be there. -floor

"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

What do you call a fat ginger kid? Whatever his name is.

Y did the boy fall down the stairs???? He was In a wheel chair

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Justin Bieber

A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

what did the farmer say when he lost his red tractor?

i hate this glue. give me one new or i will poo.

What's the difference between a book and a house? Their names

Roses are Red Violets are blue I am an onlince predator Post your address in the comment EJ

Ten green bottles hanging on the wall, Ten green bottles hanging on the wall, And if one alcoholic should one day stroll along: There'll be no more bottles hanging on the wall.

Nero, I can barely stay awake, can we chat more later today though? I would really enjoy that, and sleep before that.

How does a doctor wake up in the morning He opens his eyes

What's big, red and delicious? A prune. I lied about it being big, red and delicious.

A man walks into a bar, he realizes he has no money and leaves

A bar walks into a man

Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Impossible, fruits to not have the ability to talk.

How do you make Lady Gaga sad? You kill her family.

How do you get four gay men on one stool? You get three more stools.

what did the unicorn say to the centaur? nothing because neither exist

Why couldn`t Sally open the jar? Because she did not have thumbs.

Q: Why can't Carl drive? A: Carl is a stone

How to condom style ! Ayyyyyyy thts ur baby ! No! No! No! No! No! No! Broken condom style ;)

When is a door not a door? Never.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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