Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?! No one... pineapples float.

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Why did humpty dumpty fall off a wall? Well it turns out that he was a raging psycopath. to add on, he was also a suicidal

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Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? Because it could see and hear.

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You know the drill, the world is not as black and white as it was before, just because we are not on the same side, does not make us enemies either. As for whatever is going on, I can assure you I had nothing to do with the fall of the first underground, and neither will I make sure whatever you scraped together, large or small falls either, I realize I should have thought this trough some more, but we had little time to act on this one.

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What's blue, orange, and silver all over? Nothing. That's a ridiculous combination of colors.

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how do you kill chuck norris? you dont, killing is illegal

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There was this girl who suffered for her whole life and then she died. It was very liberating.

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Knock Knock. who's there? James. well use the doorbell.

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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what falls from the sky, is white, and can kill you a refrigerator

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What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

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Whats worse than getting an eye gouged out? Getting both eyes gouged out?

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have you seen stevie wonder's harmonica? neither has he.

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Hard work and dedication

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"knock knock" "who's there" *no answer* Opens door to find dead wife lying on doorstep with 'lol' stamped on forehead

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Robert Palmer: Doctor Doctor give me the news! Doctor: You have contracted lung cancer and AIDS. You will die before Christmas.

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Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

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A man walks into a bar. He says ouch.

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Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

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Where did Sudie go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window... ...But I am the Goddamn locksmith!

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Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? Because he's dead.

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yo mama soooooooooooo fat that she should be concerned of the incressed risk of dibties

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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