Why did the mouse cross the road? Because he had been attached to the chicken with a nail gun.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin Holy shit a talking muffin

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How many black basketball players does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They're all rather tall therefore they can reach the light source with ease.

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Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

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What's worse then getting followed by a creepy man in a van? Getting followed and raped by a creepy man in a van.

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How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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whats worse than having ice cream and not eating it? Being lactose intolerant

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what do you call a black guy with a bachelor's degree? by his first name, "Carl".

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Q: what's red and blue and covered in piss? A: everything. I'm so sorry.

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What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger....... unless it is a nonkiller disease that makes you extremely weak :D

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Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his power level? I can't remember... :(

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A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

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I dyed my armpit hair blue yesterday because I wanted to start a new trend. My boyfriend later broke up with me.

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What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who is driving? They take turns due to the fact it is a long trip.

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What's black and white and red all over? A greyish red object.

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What did the big Chimney say to the little Chimney? Nothing they are chimneys ....

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When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

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what do you get when a white man and a black woman have a baby? A baby

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Stop driving smart cars you fags

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I'm schizophrenic and so am I. I also happen suffer from multiple personality disorder. Schizophrenia refers to separation of mental functions, manifesting in anti-social behavior and delusions, and is unrelated to the separate disorder of dissociative identity disorder, popularly known as multiple personality disorder, characterized by at least two distinct and enduring identities and dissociated personality states. Both are crippling to normal behavior and function due to lack of public awareness and funding. Now get out of our ghost train or we'll cut you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops