What did the penguin say to the other penguin? Nothing, penguins don't talk.

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Why does it get hot after a basketball game? Because of the crowd all breathing out carbon dioxide and the high level of activity generating excess body heat.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown I should probably water My garden soon.

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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What is so sad about 5 black people going over a cliff in a Ferrari? That was my Ferrari by darragh hamilton

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There is a Asian a black guy and a white guy the black guy loves apples the white guy loves pears and the Asian loves Macaroni the white guy gets a apple the black guy gets a pear and the Asian has no lunch so the black guy kills the white guy for the apple and the Asian kills the black guy because he is hungry

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Oh you have herpes? yeah, there's an app for that.

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why did the black man start crying? because his ancestors were treated horribly

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I will grant you one wish, but it sure as hell isn't coming true!

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A Russian man walks out of a bar looking very sober because he walked out of the bar sober.

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Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? Because he's dead!

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One early Christmas morning i went downstairs. My mother told me that she had gotten me the ultimate stocking stuffer. It was a foot

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What's round and bounces A basketball No!!!!!!! You dummy!!! Then what? Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

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Ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

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What is long, hard, and full of semen? An erected penis.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle.

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What do a worm and a human have in common? They both have arms and legs apart from the worm

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Slowly being tortured to death.

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit him with an ax

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

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what did the jew get for Christmas? cancer. and aids

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A man asks his doctor if you can die from drinking to much water. The doctor replies 'Yes you can'

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Q: What did the giraffe say to the sunflower? A: I like your shoelaces!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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