why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

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When life gives you lemons, go sell them for crack.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

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Roses are potatoes Violets are potatoes I like potatoes Potatoes.

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Justin Bieber

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Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

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a man was beating his wife his wife asks him to stop he says no and continues beating her

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What did the Black man say to the prostitute? Your job makes the risks of getting AIDs and other STDs much higher than the average person's.

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What do the Irish do on their birthdays? Eat birthday cake and sing happy birthday

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Why did the chicken cross the playground. He didn't. chickens are unsanitary to have in schools

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Knock knock Fuck off!

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What's better than a stick? A stone

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What is wrong with being a black Jew? You have to sit in the back of the oven.

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Roses are red, Violets are purple, not fucking blue.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He did it for fitness.

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Why did the turtle cross the road? Because there was a chicken stapled to his face.

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Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

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Okay.. So a dyslectic man walks into a bra...

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How many mentally challenged beings does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well one couldn't do it so adding more to the equation will only make it worse sir.

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Why did the kid lose his nose? because his brother chopped it off with an axe.

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A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

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I have existed for over 6000 years and around vi0lating people long before you where ever born kid... You do not believe me you say? friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: You do not believe me? According to this DNA test... Welcome to papa son/daughter... Its time to make you a man/woman now, and then TIME TO MAKE YOU my BlTCH!

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What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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