Why didn't the man get into Harvard? Because he had bad grades

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Q: What do you call a fish with no eye? A: Fssshh

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How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

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What do you call a guy with a rainbow tuxedo on? A classy man that is very well dressed

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What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

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If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Deteriorate

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Listen Supervisor, this is Agent Clarke of the GOV and the WHO, I suggest you respond ASAP, I suggest you put set me in touch with either Lady, or Axel Knight right away, this is a matter of your personal security.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a serial-rapist with links to the Black Dragon triad. Yee.

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Me: Wanna play a game of red light and as I get closer to you, you get to call red light?? girl: Yea! okay, go! girl: green light!! Me: Sorry, firetrucks don't stop for red lights

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Bob loves Anne. Anne loves Bob. No one cares.

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Roses are brown I likes clouds This joke isn't funny so don't laugh

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What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

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Is it considered sexual harassment if a midget says to a woman, "your hair smells nice"? Holy crap i don't like black people.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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What did Hitler say to the Jewish boy? Nothing, Hitler died many years ago...

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What's funnier than Tom Cruise laughing like a badass? Chuck Norris

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How can you tell if someone is a global warming alarmist? Their IQ on average is 10 points below normal

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What did Hitler say when he was dying? He said, "I'm dying."

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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Q: What's worse than a black guy with a gun? A: the holocaust

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Remember Y2K? That could have been bad.

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Hey I Just Met You , And This is Crazy But Don't Text. My Phone Cuz You Stalk Me Daily #Taste_MyCarmel

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Your momma is so fat, she should be concerned about her increased risk if a heart attack because of her poor eating habits.

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A stranger pulls up next to a little boy walking home from school. The stranger offers the boy a ride home. The boy says yes, gets in the car, and is driven home as promised

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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