What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your Grandmother died.

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her: what did your last slave die of? him: syphillis

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What does a dishwasher and the holocaust have in common? Not much.

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why are some people black? Because god decided there needs to be different people in the world therefore none are congruent

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Why is my son so unhappy? Because I beat his mother violently in front of him

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Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She was too tired and was afraid that if she got behind the wheel it might cause her to fall asleep at the wheel which would result in an accident.

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Two 16 year old girls are chatting on their way to school: Girl 1 : "hey, is that a hickey on your neck? say, have you been naughty? is it Brian's mark?" Girl 2 : "That's not a hickey, it's a bruise. My dad came home drunk again last night and beat me up for no reason."

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David walks into a bar. Someone shoots him. Now hes dead.

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Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

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A grandfather clock fucked my bicycle!

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Your mom is so stupid... She was unable to go to college and therefore was not able to find a good job.

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YOUR MOMMA IS SO FAT WHEN SHE JUMPED FOR JOY........she didn't get stuck because there's nothing to get stuck in.

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why was the girl unhappy? because she was stapled to a shark.

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A blind man walks into a bar... He tragicly attracts aids and dies as the bar is shut down for health purposes

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whats more embarissing rhan being raped by a squirel? Being a 40 year old virgin working at mcdonalds

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Why did the depressed man commit suicide? Its typical of a depressed person.

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Wanna hear something irrational? Pi

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why did the man shave his balls cause they were unnecessarily hairy

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What happened when the young child fell off of the swing? He broke open his head causing him to be sent to the hospital for 3 weeks.

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A man told his daughter not to give his dog coffee. His daughter turned and told him that she was his nurse and his alzheimers is getting worse.

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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