why did the elephant cross the road? it was the chickens day off.

Call me for a good time! 402-805-2412, I do anal!;) -Martini Wyant

Want to hear a joke? Jerry Sandusky's innocence

What did the ocean say the other ocean? Nothing, bodies of water are incapable of speech.

What did the Beatrice do after she got kicked off of X Factor? she went to a nearby store and bought a slim jim

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

Why was the minority sad? Because the police beat him and then he was raped in jail.

Why did The Chicken cross The Road? The Chicken was a new drug dealer to town and he did a deal with The Road , the town's existing drug dealer (they used these nicknames to hide their identities), but then back stabbed him to try and take the whole area for himself. Money and Power, as always.

Guys, I think I'm gonna apply to join the Crips. My SAT score is a 2050, and their average score is a 2200. My GPA, however, is a 4.6, and their average is only a 4.2. Do you guys think that they will take me? Or should I try and apply for the Bloods?

Why did Poppy lose at sports day? Because she had a heart attack and died.

whats black with purple?nothing no animals or humans have anything like that

Gods like Santa one day you'll get to the age of reason and see how dumb you were

A man penetrates another man.

What's worse than a bee sting? The holocaust What's worse then the holocaust? Two bee stings

Roses are red,vilots are blue just wait till I poo and till i kiss you

Doctor Doctor i have a shoe in my braces. I bet it smells haha.

¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯ ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ _________________________________________ That's a road. Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot that made this joke, me. And what did the idiot do? He ate it with barley. There was food poisoning. Where did the idiot's vomit go? In yo poo.

whats the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari. I don't have a ferrari in my garage

a white man a black man and an asian man had a few drinks at a bar. they all died from alcohol poisoning

A generous manager, an honest lawyer, a responsible politician and a dodo bird fall off a cliff. Who survives?. None, they are all long since extinct.

what happened to the chicken who crossed the road he didn't realize that the light was green

What is shit? It's Deshitified already.

what did batman say to robyn before he got in the car?... "get in the car"

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender, upon seeing him, asks him to leave. The black man is enraged by the blatant racism shown by this man, and proceeds to punch the bartender repeatedly. After 5 minutes of non-stop punching the man stops, looks at his victim, and is filled with remorse. He is dead. Upon looking around, the black man notices scaffolding and building equipment scattered around the room. He falls to the ground as he realizes the bar is still under construction, and unable to serve customers this early in development. The bartender was simply asking the man to leave for his own safety.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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