Why do cow say moo? Because you touch yourself at night

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How you know when dislextic

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An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

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Do you know why, when geese fly south for the winter, one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

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what movie can a retarded 8 year old play the lead role in. Zathura

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Listen Supervisor, this is Agent Clarke of the GOV and the WHO, I suggest you respond ASAP, I suggest you put set me in touch with either Lady, or Axel Knight right away, this is a matter of your personal security.

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Why do cats have nine lives? Because they don't have ten.

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What do you do if you walk in on your wife atempting to hang herself in the living room? Ask her to leave the living room, as it would be ironic.

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What did the child get from there parent on Christmas? Nothing. He's an orphan.

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what happens when a mexican makes love to an octopus? It makes a freaking weird looking animal

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What's big with fat all over it? Your mom on this dick

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Why was six afraid of seven? He wasn't. that joke is just a way to convince you that seven is a scary number.

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What did the sad man say to the happy man? He didn't say anything he was so sad he killed himself.

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Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

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Why was the black man hanging from the tree? He fell and had to grab a branch.

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Why Johnny's parents threw out his broken bike? - ´Cause Johnny got ran over by a drunken driver yesterday, when he was cycling back home from school.

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Do they censor Ass? TESTING TESTING ASS ASS ASS

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Q. what tall and looks like a jew? A.TODD

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Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

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If you have a dinosaur, how many bicycles do you need to do your homework? Yes, because chewing gums would ask if Greg can go to the handball match.

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How do you get through a locked door? Unlock it.

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how do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The fridge is on its side, the door is torn off, and the ruined food scattered all over the floor. Not to mention there is an elephant in your kitchen.

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What's long and hard and full of semen? An erect penis at the climax of an orgasm.

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What is worse than ten babies in the street, eleven babies in the street.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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